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August 31 - Okay,
now they've really hacked me off.
As you've heard a bunch of very pathetic people went to
Austin this weekend to try to get Rick Perry to
secede Texas from America. They are prepared
Saturday, secessionist speakers denounced the
federal government in general - and the Obama
administration in particular. One speaker said, "We
are aware that stepping off into secession may be a
bloody war. We understand!"
I guess they forgot who won the last civil war in
America. Hint: it wasn't Texas. I'm just
wondering whose blood he's talking about. It
better not be mine because as a fifth generation Texian
who loves her state in spite of the Bushes and Phil
Gramm, I ain't cuttin' and runnin' and having to have a
passport to go to New Orleans.
Boys, you lost the election for President of the Unites
States and you're fixing to lose Texas in the next
election. Cowboy up and take like an old bull in a
blue norther. We put up with 8 years of you trying
to destroy America, but you can't even put up with 8
months of us trying to fix it. What the hell kind
of chicken are you?
But where they really got my goat was by claiming that
my personal Texas hero - Sam Houston - favored
Go to the back of the class.
Sam was willing to give up his office rather than
secede from the Union.
Sam would not have put up with this crapola. Sam
would have ridden his horse into the crowd, drunk, and
still whipped all of you. He was a better man
drunk than these dudes are sober.
They better leave Sam out of this. I'll get me up
a posse with
Long and come after their goofy butts.
I hope he wins every week. I'm organizing Women
Who Love To See Tom Dance to do call-in vote campaigns.
August 30 - My
friend Alice showed me the most wonderful piece of
charming genius in the New York Times this morning.
August 30 -
I told you how Pete Olson gleefully exploited a child at
his health care town hall in Fort Bend County. He
has a photo of a little boy who had a heart transplant
and lived, after his mother had to go all the way to
Detroit to find a doctor who would do the surgery.
Olson uses this child to praise the free market,
ignoring, of course, all the children who have died
waiting for medical care or medicine their parents
And then there's this: why did this mother, who
lives within biking distance of the Texas Medical Center
have to go all the way to Detroit? Why did the
free market in Texas fail her?
Well, they were ready for Olson in the other half of
John Cobarruvias took this amazing video of Olson
being more stumped than a toe in a room full of rocking
When baffled for an answer he simply says, "Well, this
mother believes he would have died under Obama's health
Notice how quickly Olson shuts the meeting down when he
Thankfully, in this country we do not base on our laws
on what one mother in Clear Lake, Texas, believes might
happen. Unthankfully, in this country we have
congressmen who will exploit that mother and her child.
Neither of Sen. Ted
Kennedy's colleagues from Texas, Republican Sens.
Kay Bailey Hutchison and John Cornyn, will be
attending the Massachusetts senator's funeral in
Boston on Saturday.
Hutchison, who is
running for governor, will be attending private
meetings in Texas. An aide to Cornyn confirmed via
e-mail that the senator would not be traveling to
Boston for the funeral but did not say why.
My theory is that Kay is holding private
meetings with her hairdresser in her upcoming battle of
the do's, and that Cornyn's fringe jacket is at the dry
That's just my theory. Thelma says they're both
suffering from the crippling disease of bad taste
coupled with chronic social retardation. Thelma's
a philosopher so she should know.
watching the funeral now and think
their absence kind of classes up the
Susan, I guess to have gone to
Teddy's funeral was just too
much hypocrisy even for them --- and
that's saying a lot! Or maybe
they were afraid the crowd of people
who loved Teddy would turn
on them.<G> Literally.
August 28 -
As a matter of fact, Glenn, "Oligarchy" has a C in it -
I am not certain what pharmaceuticals were harmed in the
making of this video.
Beck's defense, it's simply a little known
olig - from the Greek for "few or
scanty" argh - from the Pirate for
"vocalization indicating affirmation"
What that's got to do with Obama is anyone's
the little one to get a mentally imbalanced,
paranoid, oilygharkiky wingnut
Teh stupid, it
Oh I love
it when they do stuff like Glenn Beck
did. I wonder if he had any comments
for his audience after it was pointed
out that he had just made an ass of
himself on national t.v.?
August 28 -
Okay, I was the first to warn you that the Rick Perry -
Kay Bailey Hutchison race was going to be a real
If you thought I was wrong,
it's only because you forgot what a complete and total
bitch Rick Perry is.
(Click the little one to get the big one.)
It seems that Rick wants to use a video that Kay did of
her own announcement tour. He wants it on his
vicious little website,
www.washingtonkay.com . Rick thinks Kay's
video is "disastrous" and wants to use it against
Then he writes a snarky letter to the Texas Ethics
Commission asking how he has to report this. Is it
an in-kind contribution? And then in classic
Hollywood bitchery, he has his campaign manager ask, "I
am not certain of a dollar amount for the video but
would be willing to report it as 'priceless'."
Oh snap. Oh, girlfriend. Talk about
August 28 - Thanks to Dennis for this heads-up
about our favorite campaign contributing engineering
They seems to think that giving large campaign
contributions allows them to the keys to the public
They've been to League City.
The city, which already has
spent $42,000 to figure out why a broken water plant
wasn’t working, will spend another $33,000 to turn
The city bought the plant in 2000 for $175,000 and
spent $1 million fixing it in 2005, but it never
By The Numbers
• $175,000 to buy the plant in 2000
• $1 million to PBS and J engineers to get plant
• $42,000 to Camp Dresser and McKee to assess why
plant wasn’t working
• $33,343 to Camp Dresser and McKee to make it work
dunno about you, but I'd ask for my million back.
August 27 -
Reason #498 of Why I Truly Dislike Republicans.
Click the little one to get the big one.
Okay, that's what Republicans would do so they figure
that we're as perverted as they are.
up to reason #498 to truly dislike
- Thanks for the heads up, Robin.
They are dropping like flies in Harris County.
A Harris County Criminal
Court-at-Law judge was indicted this morning for
misdemeanor official oppression, officials said.
Few details were
immediately available regarding the charge against
Don Jackson, a 17-year judge, said Joe Stinebaker,
spokesman for Harris County Judge Ed Emmett.
I still they
were separated at birth or Guido is
moonlighting. You know priest have to go to
extremes to get some.
August 27 -
My friend Kary passed this along because he knew I'd
Conroe, Texas, is just north of here and Kary grew up
there. As soon as he could, Kary left there like a
bullet with legs because Conroe is redneck country.
Real redneck. Hon, their necks are red as baboon
Their Congressvarmint, Kevin Brady, who I really ought
to keep a better eye on, held himself one of those town
His was an ice cream social. I do not kid
about ice cream. In my world, ice cream is
Some folks were a tad upset because they couldn't get
in the meeting what with all the free ice cream.
See, Bush just flat out ruined the economy in Conroe.
People are hungry.
However, this woman from the newspaper article was
worth it all even if they ate all the ice cream in
I'm just gonna quote it ---
Carter and her husband arrived in Conroe as soon as
possible but found themselves several feet away from
the door, waiting for the second meeting. They came
from San Jacinto County just to be heard.
“I don’t want it (health care system) to change,”
She said she just dropped her insurance two months
ago because of a lack of income, which she blames on
the current government.
That some stunning talk, ain't it? Honey, if
you're rich enough to be a Republican, you're rich
enough to buy health insurance. If you're too poor
to buy health insurance, then you ain't no damn
Cheryl, where's all them big bucks you saved up during
the 8 years of George Bush? Did you just waste it
all down at Wal-Mart on new kitchen curtains?
August 27 -
Cap'n Randy Neugebauer, who is paying for his yacht
with his campaign donations from big insurance and
banking? Randy, as you recall, lives in Lubbock,
where is not enough water to bathe properly. So
Randy keeps his yacht in DeeCee so he doesn't have to
slum with people who live in his district.
Well, Randy has found a brand new way to spend all that
money that big insurance and oil interest heave on him:
he's going to defeat Nancy Pelosi.
I think she made a comment about the size of his yacht.
(KCBD) - Congressman Randy Neugebauer says it's time
for conservatives to regain control. His plan
includes ousting democrat Nancy Pelosi as Speaker of
the House. To do so, Neugebauer pledged $250,000 to
help conservatives from other districts win their
campaigns. Money will come from his campaign as well
as fund raisers.
And here's how he plans to do it ---
people don't want the government to tell them what
to do, and feels Pelosi has shut out democracy.
That's why he pledged to help true conservatives
around the nation win their campaigns. "I had people
come up to me and say I want to give to this cause.
So, I think when the people are so motivated right
now, they're going to rally around this cause,"
People! Heads-up. Duh. He ain't gonna
use your money to defeat Pelosi. He's gonna buy a
new car with it. Or some of them real prissy
But y'all just go ahead and give this fool money.
You might as well burn rocket fuel in a coal oil lamp or
buy pearls for a pig.
Randy, wonderful Randy. He's a Republican money
August 27 -
I have some explaining to do for my Republican lurkers
at this website.
We're gonna bury Teddy Kennedy this weekend and you're
not going to understand it.
Democrats are not all Episcopalians. Unlike you,
we are raucous when we plant our departed. A
proper planting can be heard a block away.
I remember the Republicans pitching a fit when Bill
Clinton laughed out loud at Ron Brown's funeral.
They used this as absolute proof that that Bill Clinton
had Ron Brown killed. And then they hollered for
months that we used Paul Wellstone's funeral as a
That's what we do. It's how we funeralize.
If I go to Sweet Jesus' arms without loads of laughter
to propel me, Jesus will think he's got the wrong Susan
and I'm going to get comfort for something that wasn't
even bothering me. My life will have been a
failure if there's more tears than laughter at my
And if my friends don't discuss politics at my funeral,
I'll be back to haunt them. Dammit, I cared about
campaign finance reform; it's part of who I am.
Planting me without discussing politics would be like
burying Mickey Mantle without discussing baseball.
I also want them to sing - very loudly, off key and
with complete joy and abandon. And dance a little.
So don't pretend to be mortified this weekend.
You know for a fact that you wish you were one of us
because we comfort, love, and laugh. We believe in
community and good works, and we want our lives to mean
something. Our friends and family take on the duty
to to keep our dreams alive. They make a lot of
noise doing it. Good on 'um.
So if you're prone to jealousy, don't even turn
on the teevee this weekend because we're gonna be loud.
You just won't understand it.
from greater Boston, where you can't swing a
dead cat over your head without hitting
someone who (a) has been helped by one of
Senator Kennedy's bills, (b) has had
personal constituent service from Himself,
or (c) has a great story to tell about
running into Ted on the campaign trail, at a
public event, or just putting around hither
Thanks for your piece warning your
Republican lurkers about the revelry that
will accompany our mourning here over the
next few days. I shall continue to pray that
those who are just dear misled souls will
find inspiration in our remembrance. As for
those less dear souls who may try to pull a
Wellstone on us, let me remind them of the
old Irish toast:
May those that love us, love us.
And those that don’t love us,
May God turn their hearts.
And if he doesn’t turn their hearts,
May he turn their ankles,
So we’ll know them by their limping.
Pulling a Wellstone in the midst of this
remembrance would be like wearing orange in
South Boston on St. Patrick's Day--a very,
very ill-advised idea.
Thanks for mentioning the Republican ire
over Bill Clinton laughing at Ron
Brown’s funeral. My memory of that is
still pretty fresh. As I recall there we
no Republican members of Congress in
attendance at his service. Not one.
Clinton may have laughed, but at least
he had enough respect for his cabinet
member to be there for the funeral.
friends don't bring over enough food to
make Jenny Craig faint, you've not got
If your family doesn't bring out the
dorky pictures of you on Easter of your
thirteenth year, you've done them wrong.
If there are no tears, you never
mattered. If there is no laughter, you
had no life.
Singing and storytelling are necessary.
And I'm an Episcopalian.
Ted was a
Mick...of course there will be laughter
and tears and probably lots of booze at
the various wakes. I'd hoist a pint of
Guiness for Himself!
If the Rethugs don't like it, they can
go to Hell; no doubt many are headed
that way now.
August 26 - I was
Al Green's town hall on health care last night in
Missouri City. I took some great pictures for
and then promptly went off and left my camera at the
event. So, if you found my camera, call me.
Here's a shot I took with my cell phone of the line of
people just waiting to get in. Okay, so that's
boring. I lost my danged camera, okay? I'm a
natural blonde - just consider yourself lucky that I
even remember where I was last night.
Republicans in Fort Bend County are very fond of saying
that they are not concerned about winning in 2010
because African Americans won't vote with Obama not
being on the ballot.
They are whistling past the graveyard, Babe.
Over 1,100 people attended Al Green's town hall in Fort
Bend County. Contrast that to the 200 people who showed
up at Pete Olson's. Black Americans feel
empowered. They will show up and they will vote.
Of the 1,200 people there, no more than a couple dozen
were Republicans Screamers.
They didn't scream. That could have been because
Constable Ruben Davis, who is so big that he looks like
he ate his brother, was keeping order. They took
one look at Ruben and decided he could have all the
order he wanted and then some.
And then there was Congressman Al, a very smooth
operator. He got us all to agree on rules and all
agreeing to respect each other before this sucker even
started. Al Green's intelligence, good humor, and
obvious love of his country came shining through last
night as it usually does. He caught the Republican
Screamers off guard
unlike Pete Olson's town hall, Congressman Green
ain't no danged scardy cat. Questions were not
screened. No siree, he took questions from the
floor. All he asked is that if you had a question,
you put your name in a bowl. Names were drawn by
audience members who verified that was the name they
Congressman Al Green ain't no Pete Olson wimp.
He made us a promise that night. Whatever health
care reform they pass, he will give up his congressional
health care and take the program all the rest of us
It was a great evening with great friends.
August 26 -
I was prepared to write about Congressman Al Green's
town hall this morning, but even the 1,100 people there,
almost to a person acting like a Norman Rockwell
painting, which seemed so grand and promising last
night, seems small compared to the loss of health care's
"For all those whose cares have been our concern,
the work goes on, the cause endures, the hope still
lives, and the dream shall never die."
-Sen. Ted Kennedy
1980 Democratic National Convention
I will write about the town hall later. I promise.
You know that Sermon on the Mount you gave because so
many people came while you were healing the sick that
you had to climb a mountain to be seen and heard?
Remember that part where you said blessed are the
merciful? You didn't exactly mean us, did ya?
See, I'm wondering about that because there are so many
Christians who want to leave all the healing up to you.
They don't want everybody to have heath care, just the
rich, who, of course, you love best. Which I'm
sure makes you very happy, but also very busy because
there are so many un-rich since you won the 2000
election. Not a criticism. I'm just saying
And that Love One Another stuff was just your hippie
phase, right? You changed your mind about that
after you met some Romans, right?
And that part in Matthew 6 about religious ostentatious
behavior, concerning alms, praying, and fasting not
being done in public? Well,
that wasn't for Michelle Bachmann, right?
So, anyway, here's the deal - if you hear a prayer from
starving Michele asking you to do something really mean,
a few of us would appreciate it if you could ask your
Father about that lightening thing.
Your Friend Susan
Susan, the one thing I've learned here
in South Mississippi is that when
someone talks about what a fine
Christian they are, or if someone tells
you that someone is a fine, pious,
honest Christian, look out. You're
about to get screwed. But don't worry.
They are against gays and abortion so
they must be fine Christians, and
they'll be in church Sunday slapping
backs and singing psalms.
August 25 -
I am going to enjoy the 2010 Republican primary more
than I ever even dreamed of.
Most of you know that Sarah Palin will be endorsing
Governor Rick Perry for re-election over Senator Kay
Now come to find out, Newt Gingrich, my personal
favorite Republican moral degenerate in a field of
plenty, is coming to Texas to
endorse Railroad Commissioner Michael Williams for
Hutchison's senate seat.
Ho boy, I get a front row seat to a Republican free for
all right here in Texas. I'm gonna have to install
a Nasty-O-Meter before this sucker is over.
August 24 -
I pledge allegiance to Bob's shirt, under God, with
liberty and justice for Bob.
Can you even begin to imagine
what Republicans would say if we had done
a stunt like this?
Illinois Republicans are a patriotic
They start their
meetings with a recitation of the
Pledge of Allegiance, the nation’s unofficial
loyalty oath. And so it was last week when
Republican Party leaders met at a Springfield hotel
prior to attending Republican Day at the Illinois
Republican county chairmen (party
leaders, not county board leaders) held a meeting
and prepared to recite the pledge. Oops. There was
no flag in the room for them to face while reciting.
What to do?
Why, call on a fellow named Gene to
come to the rescue. Gene was wearing a shirt decked
out in an American flag pattern. He came forward,
and the group of assembled Republicans pledged
allegiance to his shirt.
This is not Gene. However, I suspect this is
Gene's wife, Rhonda Lynn, borrowing Gene's shirt for a
little post-meeting head knocking. It just ain't
proper to hit somebody you disagree with unless you're
wearing a flag.
It's been over forty years since Abbie
Hoffman wore a shirt like that before the
House UnAmerican Activities Committee. He
was arrested for flag desecration and
sentenced to thirty days in jail. Those were
the good old days, huh?
don't remember exactly when or where, but
the same thing happened (pledging to flag
shirt) in Fort Bend at some
Republican function in the last few years. I
wasn't particularly offended or I would have
written about it. I just thought it was
I do remember going to a Republican
convention a few years ago when they were
determined to keep me out of the party and I
was determined to be in just to irritate
them. Everyone there--man, woman and
child--had on some form of a flag or red,
white, and blue on their person. I do
remember writing then that the same people
wanted to throw hippies in jail for wearing
the same things 20 years ago.
time I saw the American flag hanging from
something that ugly was Jerry Jones' new
stadium in Arlington...
(sorry...Cowboys-hater from way back...)
IN recent days, yet
another wealthy private customer of the Swiss-based
banking conglomerate UBS admitted to criminal fraud
in a growing parade of perp walks that could extend
into the thousands.
It is a case that
threatens to ensnare former Sen. Phil Gramm, the
Texas Republican who is vice chairman of UBS'
investment banking business. Given the widespread
involvement of UBS in what the Justice Department
alleges were systematic efforts to violate U.S. tax
laws, it must be asked: Did Gramm as a top executive
have no inkling about what was going on?
It's worth reading the whole article to see how Phil and
his wife are going to have to decide if they are the
most crooked or the most naive and incompetent people on
the planet. Given both their egos, they would
never admit to the last.
Ever notice how as he gets older and older
ol' Phil comes more and more to resemble a
malevolent stomped on toad Muppet?
waiting a long time for this. Phil and
Wendy were big players in the Enron debacle,
but they skated on all that. Gramm was
behind the deregulation that crashed the US
economy last year bringing world-wide
disaster, but somehow that's getting blamed
on Barack Obama. Now he's done a number on
the Swiss Banking system. Makes me wonder if
the Gnomes of Zurich are the type of folks
that would have somebody whacked for messing
up their business.
August 23 -
As I've said before, my Congressvarmint, Pete Olson is
Phil Gramm's puppet.
That becomes very obvious at townhall meetings when Pete
can't answer questions if Phil's not there; and even if
Phil is there, Pete can't talk when Phil's drinking
Pete had a townhall meeting yesterday in Republican
country. I didn't get to go, but my friend Hal
taped the event and my friend Geri scanned copies of the
Pete Olson could not answer the simple question, "What
is the Republican health care plan?" His gold star
answer was, "To have affordable, available, quality
healthcare." Period. The end. That's
When he was asked the one word question, "How?", Olson
launched into a crazy rant.
Go see it on Hal's site. It's a treat.
Hals' entry about the event is also a treat.
And Geri scanned the handouts. It has a copy of
the Republican plan (You'll just love it!) and a picture
of a little boy that the Democrats would have killed.
Pete Olson gleefully exploits children.
I think what Olson needs are pictures of people who
have died while insurance fat cats got between them and
their doctor. I can provide him some dandy ones. Here's the handouts in
pdf format. When you see it, you will
understand why Pete Olson is singlehandedly responsible
for the dumbing down of America.
The #1 thing that will pop out for you is that the
Republicans have no plan for stinkin' anything.
And it's right there in writing.
I particularly like the graph that doesn't understand
that there are fewer 70 year olds than 30 year olds.
Pete Olson is hoping that his supporters failed math.
Thanks to Geri and Hal for being our eyes and legs this
weekend. They said it was great fun!
August 21 -
Thanks to Mike for this
excellent Tom DeLay website.
I wish I could do Photoshop. It's a skill I
haven't bothered to learn, but I guess that's going to
have to change this television season. Otherwise,
this won't be any fun at all.
I have never seen this many people have this much fun
with Tom DeLay since .... well, since his book came out
and flopped. No, maybe since his website flopped.
No, no, wait, since it was discovered that he has no
marketable skills and can't get a job.
August 20 - This
is local stuff, but I am sure that Republicans are doing
much the same thing in your area.
This is on this week's Commissioners Court Agenda:
DISTRICT COURT: Take all appropriate action on
request to authorize reimbursement for the cost of
roundtrip airfare to Reno, Nevada, $838.90 to Judge
Brady Elliott, for use of private aircraft to attend
judicial courses at the National Judicial College.
(Fund: 268th District Court, Travel)
Republican District Court Judge Brady Elliott wants
taxpayers to pay $839 for a private jet to take him to a
I checked and I can get the same flight for $250, for a
savings of $589.
Now, you'd think that in tough economic times, elected
officials would be aware of the hardships that taxpayers
are facing instead of being in your face with their
fancy pants ways.
You'd even think Elliott would watch the spending since
he's up for re-election next year.
You'd think wrong.
This is Republican Judge Brady Elliott. What a
August 20 -
For those of you emailing me and looking for something
about Tom DeLay's claims concerning one of his townhalls
When I did my town hall
meetings — I’ll never forget one back in the 80s, on
health care, by the way. They brought in
quadriplegics on gurneys and dumped them on the
floor in front of my podium.
That never happened.
Since the early 1980's when Tom was in the State House
and I was writing for the local newspaper, Bev Carter,
the publisher of the Fort Bend Star, or I attended every
damn townhall that Tom had. Something like that
would have made the news. Quadriplegic dumping is
not something Bev nor I would have taken lightly.
Please remember that back in the 1980's, Tom has
admitted, although I beat him to the punch by writing
about it at the time it was happening, that he was
drinking very heavily and trying to chacha nakkid with
every filly in a swatch of counties between here and
My theory is that he was in a whorehouse, so drunk that
he had to hold on to a rug to lean against the floor,
and had a Come To Jesus Meeting with Jack Daniel, Jose
Cuervo, and a pavement princess - who wasn't enjoying
I can see how he'd get those things confused.
Yes, Friends, Tom DeLay makes stuff up. Maybe he
quit drinkin' but he hasn't quit lyin'.
UPDATE: I called
Bev Carter again today to see if remembered anything
about what Tom described after she had a while to
think about it.
"That did not happen," she said in a very loud voice.
After seeing your latest entry
on "Drunky McPukeshoes," my
husband suggested that Tom is
confusing the time HE was on a
gurney in Detox and fell off,
thinking he was speaking to his
Susan, I liked him better when
he was drinkin'. He quit
lyin' when he started drinkin'.
Susan, you’re not the only
one who found happiness when
‘ol Possum Head decided to
take up dancing. Gail
Collins of the New York
Times was tickled too.
to the studio for my
first rehearsal and to
meet my partner. Hope
it’s not Nancy Pelosi
:),” DeLay twittered
with the wry sense of
humor we have come to
know and love. The new
site had only 1,489
followers as of
Wednesday. It hasn’t
been up long, but he had
better get cracking. One
of his competitors, the
recycled reality show
star Kelly Osbourne, has
more than 110,000. “
is a God and He or She has a
wicked sense of humor.
I don't EVER remember
someone doing that and I
think we certainly would
have heard about it.
My favorite part of his
interview with Chris
Matthews is when he
said, "keep the
government out of my
healthcare!" Wonder why
he didn't feel that way
about Terry Schiavo?
August 19 -
Those of you who saw Tom DeLay go all certifiable on
Hardball today, claiming that quadriplegics were dumped
in front of his podium when he spoke and showing off his
high heel prancing shoes ....
... will be happy to know that we found his birth
certificate. Thanks to USexpat for the sleuthing.
And then there was his whine that he cannot carry a
firearm while indicted. Tom, Honey, your
indictment has had the lifespan of a crowbar. You
want your gun back? Quit ordering your lawyer to set up
roadblocks to going to trial.
OF NOTE: A local celebrity girlfriend and I
will soon be announcing a special Tom DeLay Watch Night
for the Dancing With The Stars that shows Tom shaking
his moneymaker. So, go get yourself a can of Aqua
Net, some Catch-me Kiss-me shoes, and a feather boa, 'cuz
there won't be any left in town once we announce this
August 19 -
Thanks to Carl for letting me know that some politicians
owing me some money.
It seems that Governor Sanford's in-laws are requesting
a refund on campaign contributions they gave him.
In the latest example
of the dismantling of one of the Palmetto State’s
legendary political partnerships, the family of S.C.
First Lady Jenny Sanford is reportedly asking S.C.
Gov. Mark Sanford for its money back.
The Sullivan Family –
which is heir to the Skil Corporation fortune – has
contributed substantially to both of the governor’s
successful statewide campaigns ....
You know, this is a plan I like.
Say you give a campaign contribution to a politician
and that politician turns out to be a stinker, getting
in bed with the other Party or a South American hottie.
You can request a refund.
Helluva an idea.
What this country needs is more money-back-guarantee
From this day forward, I am going to make politicians
sign a guarantee contract before I give them money.
Can I get a second to this motion?
Susan. You have mine. A backup plan
would include a hammer, nails and a
couple of two by fours.
you stay up nights, dreaming these
things up? If so, here's to productive
insomnia! Can we include right wing talk
show hosts guaranteeing that their rants
are truthful to this list....never mind!
What was I thinking?
If we do
this, I know a couple of Blue Dogs who
owe you and me a lot of money!
John Edwards owes me and yours $ back as
well. Pay up, John! Sanford just keeps
getting better and better. Don't bite
the hand that feeds you can be such a
August 18 -
Thanks to Sybil for sending me this pretty darned clever
"I'm not crazy" indeed. It has been my experience
in life that if people have to tell you that they're not
crazy, they probably are. Sanity is of those thing
you usually notice by just looking.
I've noticed the same thing with
respect to racists. If they
feel inclined to just tell you
"I'm not a racist," when no on
has asked or accused them of
such, it strikes me they are
August 18 - Okay,
so it's on the frontpage of the
Houston Chronicle this morning. Dancin' Tom
DeLay claims that he can actually dance.
So I know he claimed he could actually write a book
people would read, and that he's not a slut, and
that he didn't even know Jack Abramoff, and that he's
innocent of all charges, and that child labor laws were
being followed in the Marianas Islands, and that he did
not pay a voodoo queen to put a curse on Newt Gingrich.
a whole new deal. You don't lie about rubbin'
bellys on the daince-floor in Texas. You can go to
hell for that.
Tom's website has undergone it's
revision in preparation for Tom to take his
righteous place on the world stage. I know his
other money-makers fell flat, including at short but
brilliant stint at selling DeLay Inspired Jesus Scented
Yesterday, I got an email from some wacky woman at some
non profit who wanted me to write a petition against Tom
appearing on the show so she could send it around to get
it signed and then send it to the show's producers.
Are you nuts?
Y'all, I'm so excited about this that butter melts in
my presence. My bobbin is wound tight and you'd
think I had fire ants in my britches.
We're planning female watch parties all over the
county. We're wearing boas, big ole hair, and
strappy heels. There won't be a sequin to be had
in a five county area. It's gonna be bigger than a
ten buggy prayer meeting, Babe. I'll make sure
So some damn fool said I might regret this if Tom is a
good dancer. No, I will not. I want him to
be wonderful. I hope he wins every week. I do.
Then I gotta walk sideways to keep from flying until the
Y'all, listen up - this is great. The Good Lord
has kept me alive the last two years just to see this.
I've earned it.
I only have one qualm. Back when Anna Nicole
Smith had her own teevee show, I watched it once.
Only once because I thought it was sad. Anna was
intellectually challenged and did not realize that
people were laughing at her - that she was an oddity
being exploited, not a star, but she wasn't smart enough
to know that. It made me feel a sorry for her
being so desperate for attention.
I am a tiny bit afraid that I'll feel the same way
Apparently Tommy is out doing sum
kinda promotional tour for his much
anticipated appearance on DWTS.
Susan. He's using emoticons.
Isn't that just too adorable!!!!????!!!!
August 18 -
Those of you around here for the last election know that
we got ourselves a Democratic county commissioner in my
precinct after years of a Republican who was more
concerned with scoring baseball tickets from county
vendors than actually doing something that even vaguely
appeared to be work.
Our Democrat, Richard Morrison, needs our help. He's
put together a plan to widen Crabb River Road, which is
desperately needed with the new growth in the area.
Read all about it on Richard's blog.
Richard needs letters from us to get a TIGER grant, and
he needs us to show up at commissioner's court to let
them know we support this mobility project.
The last paragraph of Richard's blog entry is the
bottom line. If you live in Fort Bend, here's a
chance to do something that will make a difference in
our everyday lives. Just do it.
Personally, I like having pubic options because I enjoy
being a girl. And I like to cha cha with the other
pubic option. However, having known some
Republican men, I can understand why a Republican woman
would oppose it.
August 17 -
I want to thank Mike for making my whole day - no,
make that year.
The following actual newspaper clipping is brought to
you by the letters W, T, and F.
NEW YORK (AP) --
Former Republican Majority Leader Tom DeLay will
join 15 celebrities from the worlds of entertainment
and sports in kicking up their heels on the new
season of ''Dancing With the Stars.''
The show's largest
cast ever, announced Monday, features singers Mya,
Macy Gray and Aaron Carter; actors Ashley Hamilton,
Melissa Joan Hart and Debi Mazar (MAY'-zahr); and
models Joanna Krupa and Kathy Ireland.
include reality stars Mark Dacascos and Kelly
Osbourne; entertainer Donny Osmond; mixed martial
artist Chuck Liddell (lih-DEL'); professional
snowboarder Louie Vito; Olympic swimmer Natalie
Coughlin (KAWG'-lin); former Dallas Cowboys wide
receiver Michael Irvin and the former congressman
The ninth season of
the hit ABC show premieres Sept. 21.
Well, we should have seen this coming. He's good
at the sidestep.
Tom DeLay's new slogan: Have given up on Jesus.
Will dance for green fees.
He's gone from "I am the Federal Government," to "I am
He has been reduced to making a fool of himself on
national teevee just to get attention. Honey,
that's even better than seeing him go to jail.
Oh God, now I can die a happy woman.
watching a guy the size of a pixie dancing
around in a sequined shirt will be more fun
than I can almost stand. You should
ask for no more favors from God.
You've gotten your dream.
THIS!! I guess Blagojevich is the new model
for the professional trajectory of disgraced
politicos. Can't wait to see Sanford on I
Survived a Japanese Game Show...I hope he
gets the one where they put scorpions in his
your career might be fading when ... you're
billed behind Melissa Joan Hart, Kelly
Osbourne, and Ashley Hamilton.
Read and weep, Tom.
Maybe Texas can pass a
law to prevent him from coming back?
One of the comments on the
HuffPost story about Delay was:
"Someone hold back my hair while I
There were many other good ones.
Susan. The only thing that would
make this better is if Jerry
Springer were on this year too. I
wonder what kind of stickum he’ll
use to keep from losing his hair.
The Hammer does the two-step . . . .
. Must stop laughing before
co-workers call the emergency
response team -
wondering how they decided which
celeb is paired with which
professional dancer. The ol' dreaded
The only thing that would
tempt me to watch that jackass
on DWTS would be to see if his
dance partner would deliberately
I'd pay good money to see
But I'm also in the "makes me
want to vomit" club.
August 16 - The
McClatchy newspapers have done some research on who is
behind the rightwing assault on improving health care in
Shock of all shocks - it's all about who stands to
financially benefit on the backs on the middle class.
Remember when the rightwing extremists used to call us
Commie Dupes? Honey, they had no idea how dupey
they would become.
August 16 -
Those of you who saw Meet The Press this morning know
why you should feel ashamed that you
cost Dick Armey his job.
That adorable lug could not possibly make a living
anywhere else. Explain to me how he's supposed to
keep up the caloric intake that it requires to be Dick
Armey when he can't find gainful employment now.
My personal favorite part was when Dick was astounded
and shocked, shocked, I tell you, that some guy was
taken off disability and sent a bill for $21,000 after
he had been on disability for 7 years. This is
proof that people should be mad at their government.
Look at what they did to this poor guy!
Dick was horrified, horrified, I tell you, that this
guy's congressman or Senator wouldn't help him so the
guy was reduced to calling Dick for help.
Ya know, we have no proof that this guy even exists,
but if he does then I'll bet you my best pair of pink
boots that he got caught in a little fraud. It may
take them 7 years to catch you, but they will catch you.
In fact, I think I got an email from this guy wanting
to split his lottery winnings with me.
Dick Armey - they don't call him Dick for nothin'.
the man who owed $21,000 --
I remember my mother used to tell me
things like that they went “ I knew a
little girl who crossed the street
without looking and….” The stories
were all about “a little girl” and let
me tell you they never had a happy
The looks on
Rachel's face throught the program were
priceless. If she had been a cat, her
back woulda been arched , every bit of
fur on end and claws ready to strike.
That man makes my skin crawl and she had
to have been in great discomfort. I
thought she handled it all very well.
Susan , I
thought the same thing you did - omg,
Armey is feeling badly for a man who
defrauded Medicare Disability for 7
years. I guess that's no more
strange than making a hero out of Joe
decide if Dick's wringing his hands and
twiddling his thumbs was a nervous tic
or just a symptom of a strong desire to
get them around Rachel's neck.
Dick Armey, the former
House Majority Leader, is leaving his job with top
Washington lobbying firm DLA PIper, citing negative
attention that the firm is receiving thanks to the
role of Armey's corporate-backed outfit,
FreedomWorks, in turning out protesters to shut down
town hall meetings on health care.
No, it was not Dick Armey's fault for getting involved
with some shady activities. No, that was not why
he was asked to leave.
He was asked to leave because you're a jerk. Got
that? It's your fault, dammit.
August 14 - I got
mine ordered. Head on over and get yours.
Click right here and get yours for only $10.
Face it, it's worth $10 to hack off your brother-in-law.
And I have another question this morning.
When are we going to prosecute Karl Rove? Good
Lord, what is wrong with that man? Why does he
hate American so much? Does he think people will
ever trust him again after 8 years of the Worst
President Ever? Is he mentally and emotionally
handicapped? Why can't he just shuddup?
Okay, so that's more than one question, but not if you
say it all real fast.
August 14 -
And Carl sent this one - click the little one to get the
August 13 - My good friend Bud in Minnesooota
sent us this picture of the day ---
Encouraging bumper sticker observed
yesterday in the Houston Heights: "Los
Republicanos no hablamos por mi".
Buzzards have come home to roost over
Republicans in Tejas!
Yellow Dog Democrat in North Montrose
of this one ---
saddened to know that our ONLY lanaguage is
English. I wanted another lanaguage,
Well, the two photos of the English
speaking "morans" is right on.
Unfortunately, the bumper sticker
that Bruce quotes, "Los
hablamos por mi", is as bad.
Hablamos should have been "hablan".
Obviously written by a south Texas
gringo rather than a good south
August 13 -
Bud also wants me to remind
everybody that Michelle Bachmann makes Sarah Palin look
like a Mensa member.
Bud found a collection for our entertainment.
Michelle speaks only to God and her husband ---
Yep - my kind of woman. One taco short of the
My favorite part is when she calls herself a "fool for
Christ." I'm sure that Sweet Jesus appreciates the
Susan, Michelle Bachmann's admission that
she fasted as part of her decision making
routine does explain a lot! The poor woman
isn't bat crap crazy! the poor baby is just
light headed from lack of nourishment to her
I want to share something, speaking of
fools. I went to a "singles" thing a few
years ago at a church. (I am not a
Christian, but always nosey). So the
minister (very hunky, married) got to
speechifying and told the story of him being
tempted by a woman from work. So he went to
his wife and they went on their knees and
prayed about it............etc. you know the
So, WTF is that about? He takes this to his
wife and makes it HER problem? Get up off
your knees and slap him silly and tell him
to go back to work!
So here's the good part. When there was a
break, people said to me, oh, we don't pay
any attention to that stuff! OMG don't you
just love it???
PS: Is M Bachman a member of the Family?
Maybe they can't join, but she is
subservient to her husband, maybe they make
an acception in her case. acception, get
it, I made a joke.
12 - Oh lookie, now they're leaving their gang
sign on Democratic congressional offices.
That's good - the rightwing has finally selected an
appropriate gang sign.
At a contentious town
hall meeting last week, Rep. David Scott (D-GA) shot
back at the protesters who were disrupting his event
by accusing them of “hijack[ing]” the gathering.
Now, Scott’s district office in Smyrna, GA, has been
vandalized with a four-foot swastika painted onto
Gee, what a great way to say, "Nazis have been here."
August 12 -
This is a very cool tool.
It generates side-by-side comparisons of the different
health care plans now in play.
It's interactive so you can hone-in on what is
important to you and help settle any arguments you might
be having with the crazy guy across the street.
Go take a goo. You'll thank me.
August 12 - Oh
Lord, I'm so excited that I gotta walk sideways to keep
from flying. This is going to be more fun than a
fire at the IRS office.
Senator Kay Bailey Hutchison is gonna take on Gov. Rick
Perry all over Texas,
starting in LaMarque.
Sen. Kay Bailey Hutchison will return to her
hometown of La Marque next week to formally announce
she will run for governor.
While her campaign staff would not confirm the early
morning rally to be held at La Marque High School on
Monday, La Marque City Manager Eric Gage let the cat
out of the bag Tuesday morning when he posted an
announcement on his Twitter page.
This race has already gotten so good that Harvey
Kronberg has this at
The Quorum Report.
It's worth the price of admission, Babe.
Let the biting, pinching and hair pulling begin!
I got pointed to your site from my favorite
ex-pat, Avedon Carol, and just wanted to say
Good catch on the hypocrite jerk demanding
to see Obama's birth certificate.
I am another ex-pat, originally from Kansas
City, Missouri, so you already know why I
ran. met a girl from Australia, fell hard
for that accent, (and married someone
smarter than me too good to let go of), and
find myself in Melbourne, Australia
permanently 33 years and two kids later. The
kids turned out real good, even though they
were mostly raised outside of the USA, broad
background and all of that stuff.
In Australia, as in England, we enjoy
Universal Health Care that works well,
although a hybrid public/private plan,
public good coverage, and the option of
private to jump the queue for elective types
So I now try to let everyone I can know back
home, (and as evidenced here, some I don't
know), that universal Health Care is a very
And I also wanted to pass onto a Texan how
very much I miss Molly Ivins. You all had a
jewel there, and I miss her wit, her passion
for America, and the constitution.
I have bookmarked ya, and will come by a
visit occasionally. Best of luck, enjoyed
reading your site, and love your brand...
August 11 -
My friend Charly Hoarse does something he calls The
Chupacabra Report - News That Gets My Goat. I
honestly wish I had thought of that.
Anyway, today Charly takes after Joe Nixon, a man in
desperate need of taking. Joe was often on the
Texas Monthly's Ten Worst Legislators list. He got
his rump defeated a couple of years ago but still loves
It seems that Joe's captors, the Texas Insurance Lobby,
require him to write something every now and then even
if he has nothing to say. And the Houston
Chronicle publishes it.
It's a sad state of affairs.
... the 1st Amendment to
the U.S. Constitution protects one from being
prosecuted for political speech, but does not
protect you from disrupting the political speech of
Smart folks will take a good
ole Republican law-and-order stance and demand that
charges be filed.
Have you seen this?
August 11 -
A friend of mine from Minnesoooota sent me
this heads-up in one of the local papers. I
filed it under the title of, "How Would Jesus Riot?"
Jan Markell of Maple
Grove–based Olive Tree Ministries called on her
radio listeners to attend congressional town hall
meetings in August. “Here’s what you can do, your
congressmen and senators are coming home for much of
August,” she said on last week’s program. “They are
going to have town hall meetings all over the place.
You need to go there and give them an earful. The
ideal thing to do is to go to their town hall and
read them the riot act — in Christian love — but
read them the riot act on this issue of health
Let me see if I've got this right. We're supposed
to pray when we get sick, but put on our hat and go kick
butt when heath care is on the table?
I dunno. Maybe I went to the wrong churches all
my life, but I have a hard time finding any scripture to
living in compound in Waco, Texas, with child brides or
screaming to drown out other people's right to free
speech. I never remember Sweet Jesus ever saying,
"Go forth and holler your danged fool head off."
I could be wrong about this. I've been wrong
about Sweet Jesus before. I mean, I didn't even
know that he's a Republican.
August 9 - Our
buddy, West Texas Congressvarmint Cap'n Randy Neugebauer,
Yachting Neugebauers" fame, has signed on with other
goofy congressvarmints to demand that they get to see
Barack Obama's original birth certificate.
They think President Obama is an illegal alien, and only
producing the original birth certificate would disprove
Accordingly, today is Day #1 of Where in the World is
Randy Neugebauer's Birth Certificate?
In a charming turn of events, it seems that
Yachting Randy refuses to produce a birth certificate
of his own. I, personally, think it's because he
was born in France, which would explain a lot about
those those sissy pants he wears on the yacht.
It is certainly interesting that Randy wouldn't even
produce his birth certificate for the Houston Chronicle.
Texas Rep. Randy
Neugebauer declined the chance to show his proof of
birth. His staff sent a one-line e-mail response:
“Congressman Neugebauer will not be submitting a
copy of his birth certificate."
Also, you have to wonder how upset Randy would be if
John McCain had been elected President, because McCain
truly was not born in the USA.
Bubba says he doesn't give a flip about Randy's birth
certificate, but he would like to see the certified
results of Randy's IQ test.
He doesn't want to produce it because it
shows he was born in MISSOURI.
August 7 - My friend Ellen sent this and says she got it from her
friend Elizabeth, so this is third hand but I believe it
How Dry Is It?
It's so dry in Central Texas that the Baptists are
starting to baptize by sprinkling; the Methodists
are using wet-wipes; the Presbyterians are giving
out rainchecks; and the Catholics are praying for
the wine to turn back into water.
Republican Sen. Mel
Martinez of Florida said Friday he will step down
from the Senate before his term ends, adding fresh
intrigue over who will fill the seat. Martinez, the
only Hispanic Republican in the Senate, told
reporters at a news conference he was leaving office
of his "own free will." He announced his decision in
December not to seek to re-election in 2010.
He was one of the nine Senators who voted for Sotomayor,
so I suspect that his GOP base was out to get him.
August 6 - Uh, John, you just helped me find the something
smelling fishy and, Dude,
Sen. John Cornyn, accusing the White House of
compiling an "enemies list," has asked President
Barack Obama to stop an effort to collect "fishy"
information Americans see about a health care
Cornyn, who leads the
Republicans' Senate campaign effort, said Wednesday
in a letter to Obama that he's concerned that
citizen engagement on the issue could be "chilled."
He also expressed alarm that the White House could
end up collecting electronic information on its
John, Babe, people see you acting fishy all the danged
time and they send it to me. Goodness sake, both
Jim and Bud and sent me this one. They both have
collected evidence that
you're nuts. John, remember the Terri Schiavo event, when you
threatened judges? And, John, you sure didn't
mind the Bush administration spying on everybody
including your Grandma. But now when the Obama administration asks us to look
for Republican lies on the internet, ho boy!, you put on
your tin foil hat and think we're spying on you. John, it doesn't take the NSA to find you acting the
fool. Heck, me and Bud and Jim can do it without
breaking into a sweat.
looks like Dale Evan's sister.
Seeing that picture of a duded-up Senator
"Hipshot" Cornyn always reminds me of a
television ad from the 1960's:
"Neighbor...how long's it been since you had
a big, steamin' bowl of Wolf Brand Chill?
Heh heh...well, that's too long!"
Of course, I wouldn't buy a can of potted
meat product from this guy, let alone chili.
ago, Euna Lee and I were prisoners in North
Korea. We feared that at any moment we could
be prisoners in a hard labor camp. Then
suddenly we were told that we were going to
a meeting. We were taken to a location and
when we walked through the doors, we saw
standing before us President Bill Clinton.
We were shocked, but we knew instantly in
our hearts that the nightmare of our lives
was finally coming to an end. And now we
stand here home and free."
I cannot even imagine.
Also, here's what's weird: If I was in a
North Korean prison, cut off from the world,
and then the door opened, and there stood
George W. Bush........well......I have to
say I wouldn't be entirely certain that my
ordeal was over. In other words, you see
Clinton and you think "freedom!", but you
see Bush there, and you think "What's he
doing here? Did they catch him too? Or is he
in on it? What the hell is going on?"
And you know, in my mind, Bubba has gone and
done made up for a lot of the stuff he did
to the Southern Majority and where did it
go? And do we really want the right wing
crazies on our side?
I heard it was catching and turns the brain
First, your speech pattern deteriorates and
you blame the media (Palin). You start
screaming, then you get a crazed look on
your face (Oreilly). You become rude and
yell and shout at people (Hannity). You gain
lots of weight, go deaf and talk more crazy
(Limbaugh). You begin to look like a man (
Anne Coulter) or a witch (Malkin). The end
stage is very crazy paranoid talk and you
cry about your country (Beck).
Of course some just go out and have sex with
women who are not their wives and then they
find Jesus. And a million excuses why they
should not resign from their job, even
though if we did the same thing, they'd call
us pond scum.
You know, maybe those "camps" Homeland
Security are going to build are really for
the remaining red States. You never know!
Rand Paul, a Bowling Green, Ky., eye surgeon and the
son of U.S. Rep. Ron Paul, is running for the U.S.
Senate and will be in Richmond Aug. 22 for a
Rand Paul announced
Wednesday he’ll be a Republican candidate for
retiring Kentucky Sen. Jim Bunning’s seat, according
to Sugar Land political consultant Mark Elam, who
will host the Richmond fund-raiser.
No kidding, he named his kid after Ayn Rand. You
would name your kid after a Russian atheist who wrote
melodramatic and self-indulgent novels espousing that
selfishness is a virtue? Damn, I know full
fledged, hard core Libertarians who wouldn't go that
Look, I read Ayn Rand in the 10th grade just like
everybody else. However, I got over it by the end
of my freshman year of college, like most people do.
So, the world needs two Dr. Nos? Ron Paul is
plenty entertaining, and God knows he went through a
whole bunch of money during the last Presidential
election without much to show for it, and I do have to
say that he lives by his beliefs, but those beliefs are
mean, greedy, wacky, and non productive.
Libertarians can be elementary philosophers or they can
govern. But, they cannot do both.
Honey, we haven't had rain since Noah died. And
it's so hot that corn is popping on the stalk.
Thank you, Fort Bend County for tips to keep cool, but
I think you should have added, "Be nakkid as much as
possible. It won't keep you much cooler but it'll
entertain the neighbors."
Or - "Try not to upset Republicans. All that hot
air will just make matters worse."
August 4 - Obama
may know how to have a beer with the boys, but you still
have to call The Big Dog when dealing with crazy people,
women, or in this case - both.
North Korean President
Kim Jong Il has pardoned and released two U.S.
journalists, state-run news agency KCNA said
Thank you again, Bill.
I admit I
never thought Big Dog was apt until now,
when by God he did a great fetch this
August 4 - Oh crap, he's made Sean Hannity an
honorary Texan. I guess I'm going to have to start
referring to myself as a native of Baja Oklahoma.
Does anybody want to guess how drunk Hannity was?
I can't even figure out what he's saying at the end
except that he hates paying taxes, and I know he said
that because he always says that.
I'm pretty sure that Jerry Jeff
qualifies as a Texan even though he was born
in the Catskills. And even though I lived
there for a while, I'm pretty sure I don't
-- you can take the boy out of Brooklyn and
all that. But what about my dog Joe? I'm
pretty sure he was born in Texas because we
got him from the League City Animal shelter
and when we moved to Pennsylvania he had a
hard time learning about stairs. But the
first time he encountered snow he absolutely
loved rolling in it, biting it, and acting
like it was his best friend so maybe he
But from what I hear, if I could just
get Ricky to declare him an honorary Texan,
all that stuff about not knowing how to
climb stairs and liking snow and being
really, really, REALLY stupid wouldn't
count. Oh but wait, I've never actually
SEEN Hannity climb stairs and he acts
really, really, REALLY stupid so maybe
It all makes my head hurt.
What I'm pretty sure of is that Willie
is a Texan just the same way that Jerry Jeff
is and that Robert Earl Keen is a Texan, and
Townes van Zandt was probably a Texan and
Gary P. Nunn is a Texan and LBJ was a Texan
and George W. Bush was born in Connecticut
and if he's a real Texan then my dog
probably is, too.
August 4 -
Well now they've done it.
The Huffington Post is fixing to get sued by Junior
Janochek, Jr. of Junior Janochek's Rural Entertainment
Promoters and Keg Delivery Service, Ltd. and Inc.
They used Junior's picture on their website in
an article entitled "For the Modern GOP, It's a
Return to the 'White Voter' Strategy." Junior
Junior ain't please because that's not his best side.
Junior says that for the Huffington Post his best side
is in the middle of himself backwards.
Junior, as you know, loves Jesus but hates Jews,
Mexicans* (except for their cooking), Blacks,
homosexuals (which is a 5 syllable word for Junior) and
wimmen libbers. He also ain't real fond of Eye-talians
except for spaghetti.
I suspect that Junior will become the face of the New
GOP so I will try to keep you informed of his
activities. I was even strongly considering giving
him his own blog. Seriously.
Why was Kathleen
Turner dining (solo!) in Crystal City on
Saturday night? Turns out the whiskey-voiced actress
had a secret project in D.C. -- playing the late
political columnist Molly Ivins in
a new one-act production getting a test staging
She'd be great, huh?
August 4 -
Campers with keen observation powers will notice that
the link for my friend El Jefe Bob has changed. El
Jefe left the maddening crowd at the Chronicle's forum
because - of shock of shocks - rightwingers who are a
little shy of their hat size barfed their rants all over
the place. He and a buddy opened
their own honky
Something I've noticed: rightwingers will attempt
to consume anyone who has their own voice, but are
pitifully limp when it comes to starting their own blogs
--- or their own political party, for that matter.
I'm not declaring that to be law or anything. It's
just something I've noticed.
So, head on over to
Hurricane and take a gander at someone who can
really write, has a great sense of humor, and is a much
nicer person than I am.
August 3 - We get
email to drive the rightwingers freekin' nuts.
cut the keerap with the obviously
fake Kenyan birth certificate. This
is simply a fake distraction
from Barack Obama's real original
Canadian type birth certificate that
was issued by a socialist health
care dictator by the name of Dudley
Doright. It is certificate BR549,
which is evidence enough of the
legitimacy of this legitimate type
Canadian legitimate birth
If you want to falsely cling to the
fake Kenyan certificate you can go
to help with your legitimately
certified real name endorsement.
Just had an interesting email
exchange with George Noory, who
is the host of a national late
night radio call-in show,
I had written to tell him that
after many years of listening, I
was turning it off because it
had become nothing but a refuge
for right wing paranoia and
conspiracy theories. Noory is a
birther, unconvinced that Obama
is a citizen and spends hours on
his show promoting the birther
movement. And he thinks that I
am the crazy one for believing
Of course, he also thinks Ron
Paul, who is his hero,
represents the mood of America.
NOTE FROM SUSAN--- Being a radio
freak, I used to listen to Noory
because it was a break from
politics. I quit last week
and found something else on my
radio because Noory is joining
Bless their hearts, those birther people started off
slow and then tapered off. Now they're saying they got
a Kenyan birth certificate for Obama. I
suspect they found it in the storage closet under their
tin foil hats. Honey, they have a big garden and a
dull hoe. However, it does not appear that this is
going away for them. They are Hooked on Crazy.
I also suspect they have far too much time on their
hands because some of them have taken to staging
protests at Democratic congresscritter's home forums.
Austin's Lloyd Doggett got chased by a herd of them out
of the Randall's grocery store in Austin. I
don't know if they were armed with cans of nuts, but I
think that would be mighty appropriate.
Lloyd, to his everlasting credit, said he was sticking
to his guns.
This mob, sent by the
local Republican and Libertarian parties, did not
come just to be heard, but to deny others the right
to be heard. And this appears to be part of a
coordinated, nationwide effort. What could be more
appropriate for the “party of no” than having its
stalwarts drowning out the voices of their neighbors
by screaming “just say no”
Honey, this is Texas. Those folks are campaigning
for a butt kicking because we Democrats have had it up
to here with crazzzy Republicans trying to run things.
I mean it.
they are bragging about their disruptive behavior.
They obviously hate free speech and America.
August 2 - My friend
Kary sent me this. He doesn't know where it came
from, but he loves it. So do I.
Kary suggests that you could make a whole lot of money
by sending this to Republicans.
I am a Kenyan prince, and I have Barak
Obama's Kenyan birth certificate, but I need
your help to get it out of the country. Just
give me your bank account number and I will open
a safe deposit box at your bank in your name. I
will then have the birth certificate that proves
that Barak Obama was born here placed in your
safe deposit box. There will be no need to repay
me for this service, as I will be rewarded
simply by knowing that you will do the right
thing with this certificate and take back your
If you should happen to notice any large amounts
of money missing from your accounts, do not be
alarmed, they will be returned in no time. Just
go about your business of saving your country
and the monies will reappear shortly. Really,
they will. Stop looking at the balance. I said
stop looking, the money will be there lickedy
split. That is unless Obama took it. Yeah,
that's it, he's on to us. Hurry, get the birth
certificate out of your box. Don't let them tell
you there is no box, it is a lie.
August 1 -
And they charge you cash American money to see if you're
not even a tiny bit sane.
Having lost all their potential contributors by totally
destroying the economy, the GOP has resorted to online
trickery. You can take a
part "survey" on Obama's domestic and foreign
"agenda" (which sounds far more menacing than
"programs"), but you have to pay to see the results.
4. Everyone's Survey
answers will be tabulated. Those who donate may see
Survey results in real time following their
So, pay at least $10 and see if you're lockstep with Fox
News and Dick Cheney.
And even if you're not willing to pay, you will enjoy
some of the questions. I am certain that you ask
yourself, "Where did I miss THAT?" ---
1. Do you agree with
Barack Obama and the Democrats that taxes should be
raised for the sake of "fairness," regardless of the
negative impact it is likely to have on the
economy?9. Do you agree with Barack Obama that
empathy, and not impartiality and the rule of law,
should be a judge's guiding factor when deciding a
9. Do you agree with
Barack Obama that empathy, and not impartiality and
the rule of law, should be a judge's guiding factor
when deciding a case?
15. Are you in favor of
creating a government funded "Citizen Volunteer
Corps" that would pay young people to do work now
done by churches and charities, earning Corps
Members the same pay and benefits given to military
Barack Obama: he hates churches, the Constitution and
your right to shift your tax burden to the poor.
Good Lord - this is a Fox News test!
Thanks to Brian for the heads-up.
I got one in
the mail and so did my mother in law. It's
a whiny plea for money. Survey my ass!
saying about a fool and his money applies
Of course that always begs the question,"How
did the fool get money in the first place?"
The answer is they either got it the old
fashioned way of inheriting it or they stole
Welcome to the website formerly known as The World's Most
Dangerous Beauty Salon, Inc.
My name is
Susan DuQuesnay Bankston.
I live in Richmond, Texas, in heart of Tom DeLay's old
district. It's crazy here. No, seriously, it's
triple z crazzzy.
I used to be an independent voter, but that all changed when
I got to know a few local Republicans. They are meaner
than 10 acres of snakes and have the ethical compass of a
decided that they could just Kiss My Big Blue Butt.
A lot of
what I post here has to do with local politics, but you
probably have the same folks in your local government.
a blog. Blogs are way too trendy for me. I've
been doing this since 1992, so I'm used to it even if you
and I'll find a place to put it if I like it.