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Email comments are in the blue boxes.
July 31 - Oh
Honey, it doesn't get any better than this.
I told you early on that the Rick Perry vs. Kay Bailey
Hutchison primary race for Texas Governor was going to
be a hair pullin', arm pinchin', face slappin' witch
fight. But I never suspected that it would start
this early.
Yesterday, it was discovered that Kay is dropping little
hints in the girl's bathroom
that Rick is oh so gay.
I'll have you know that Rick Perry is not gay. Sure, so
he just likes to dress gay and act gay, but he is not,
not, not gay. Not gay. Rick is not gay.
Not. Gay.
Only Democrats are gay.
Got that?
That's how you know that Rick Perry is not gay - he's
not a Democrat. If he were a Democrat, then maybe
gay. But, he's not.
And Kay's campaign has a perfectly logical explanation
(emphasis mine) ---
Hutchison spokesman
Jeff Sadosky said Hutchison's campaign was not
condoning those words and did not know thousands
of people would be searching for them. He said
they would be removed from the site.
Campaign officials
said they bought a tool that generates the phrases
to find out the most frequent Web searches using the
two gubernatorial candidates' names.
Explanation in plain English: Thousands of people think
Rick Perry is gay.
Damn, that's some dandy explaining.
I'm gonna love this race. Yes, I am.
Susan,
Okay, enough with the
"Rick-It's-Okay-To-Be-Gay"
campaign. I found this new
thing on the Internets
called "the google" and
checked it out. "The google"
confirms that there is only
a one in 633,000 chance that
Gov. Coiffure is even
gay-curious, let alone
gay-banker-curious. It's
time for everyone to stop
staring at his sweat soaked
leather chaps and splendid
up-do. Kay Bailey is goona
swat his tawt gubernatorial
posterior with her notebook
and put that hunka-hunka
burnin' Pub to rest.
Oh,
and just to confirm that them thar
"Rick-Perry-Is-Banker-Gay-Curious"
rumors are utterly false and
unfloundered, here is pictorial
proof of Rick and his bros braggin'
and zad-ger-atin' about their
personal attributes. Well, two of
them, are talkin size, anyway.
Johnny Boy is actually quantifying
his accomplishments as the Junior
Senator from Neverneverland, TX.
This should really, really do
it. No more of the
"Rick-Perry-Is-Gay" nonsense that
has been falsely promulgated by the
loony, leftist, socialist, liberal
left, personified by Kay Bailey
Hutchison, that leftist, lunatic,
socialist, left-leaning,
left-leaning, socialist, lunatic
leftist. Rick's not gay. You heard
it here first. Let's put it to
rest. Enough. Enough, already.
U-Sex-Pat
There is (or was) a gay porn
actor named Rick Perry I found using
"Rick Perry Gay" and taking off the
"safe search option." (Kids, and
Republicans -- don't do this at home
without adult supervision).
Perhaps the producers of such oevres
as "Lumber Jocks", "Forced Entry
Squad" and "Secrets of a Wrestler,
Vol. 2" need to redesign their
websites to include "hidden phrases"
like "Kay Bailey Hutchinson".
July 30 - So
Dallas Congressvarmint Pistol Pete Sessions - they call
him Pistol Pete because he's always shooting
off
his mouth - has gone into the lucrative
Friends and Blimps Bidness.
Rep.
Pete
Sessions — the chief of the Republicans’
campaign arm in the House — says on his website that
earmarks have become “a symbol of a broken
Washington to the
American people.”
Yet in 2008, Sessions
himself steered a $1.6 million
earmark for dirigible research to an Illinois
company whose president acknowledges having no
experience in government contracting, let alone in
building blimps.
What the company did
have: the help of Adrian Plesha, a former Sessions
aide with a criminal record who has made more than
$446,000 lobbying on its behalf.
When I first read that without my second cup of coffee
this morning, I thought it said he got an earmark for a
limp. That sounded a whole lot better. Heck,
I wouldn't mind paying for that.
Thank to USExpat for
the living proof -
Susan,
On
behalf of my alma mater, Oklahoma State
University, I would like to express
extreme disgust and dismay that Pete
Sessions' nickname is the same as our
beloved mascot. That just ain't
right. I think the original Pistol
Pete, Frank Eaton, would be quite
dismayed to know who was sharing his
nickname!
Stephanie up
in Arlington
July 30 -
Thanks to Mark H. for letting us know that the Texas
Board of Ignorance, errr Education, has decided that
history is
what they say it is ---
United Farmworkers
founder César Chávez is an unfitting role model for
students, and former Supreme Court Justice Thurgood
Marshall is not an appropriate historical figure. So
say “expert
reviewers” in their report to the Texas State
Board of Education, which recommends removing the
two U.S. leaders from the social studies curriculum
taught to its 4.7 million public school students.
I don't know what the big deal is here. I mean, if
you let little minority kids know that they, too, can
make a difference in the world, then the next thing you
know, they'll start thinking they can be President or
something. This dangerous trend must be stopped.
Susan,
No wonder Texas comes in 48th in
education, among the 50 states.
The new high school that opened
in 2000, about one-half block from
my house is "Cesar Chavez High
School."
The only one in the country I
think. At the dedication, Chavez
pictures, etc., were pretty
prominent.
Thanks to the persistence of HISD
Board Member Olga Gallegos. (Mom of
State Senator Mario. )
My next door neighbors have a
son, who was a student there for a
while. I asked him if he knew who
Cesar Chavez was.
He said "no." They don't teach
anything about him -- historically.
So, Chavez has a high school
named after him -- right here in
Houston, (across the railroad tracks
from me) and the State Board of
"Ignorance" has decreed he's not
worth teaching about historically.
When you wonder how, and why,
Texas stays "Red" --- think of the
"smarts", or lack thereof, of the
people who live, work, and play
here.
A Tennessee lawmaker
resigned from the state Senate on Tuesday after his
extramarital affair with a 22-year-old intern was
revealed by an investigation into an extortion case.
"Due to recent
events, I have decided to focus my full attention on
my family and resign my Senate seat effective August
10," Republican Sen. Paul Stanley wrote in his
resignation letter.
But he takes the cake with this comment ---
"Whatever I stood for
and advocated, I still believe to be true," he said
during an interview Tuesday with Memphis radio
station WREC-AM. "And just because I fell far short
of what God's standard was for me and my wife,
doesn't mean that that standard is reduced in the
least bit."
Which is Republican speak for, "Hey, I'm 47 years old
and married, but just because I did the wild thing with
a 22 year old intern doesn't mean that I won't still be
judging YOUR behavior.
July 29 - UPDATE:
KBH announced today that she will resign her senate seat
in October or November to run for Governor.
Expect Gov. Rick Perry to call a special election for
her seat immediately - probably during the Thanksgiving
holidays.
I used to say that given all other things are
equal,
I would vote for a woman over a man because women have a
deeper sense of values. I used to believe that.
Until yesterday.
I take it all back.
Texas Sen. Kay Bailey
Hutchison announced Tuesday that she would oppose
confirmation for Supreme Court nominee Sonia
Sotomayor after the Senate Judiciary Committee voted
to send the jurist's nomination to the full Senate
for confirmation next week.
What a tramp.
If Kay has to wallow in the mud to wrestle votes from
Rick Perry, then she might as well get some tassels and
a pole. Heck, exotic dancers sell out, too, but at
least they have a higher class clientele than Texas
Republican voters.
Things may
get interesting. The R's are going to eat
their young in the primary for Governor, and
the D's may have a chance to win both the
Governor and Senate seats. I really thought
KBH would renege on her promise to resign,
and she still may, but hope springs eternal.
Mah Fellow
Murkuhn
July 28 -
We get email that will drive the Birthers more nuts than
ever ---
Susan; I just happened to run across your
postings on the internet. I am originally
from Tennessee and many Tennesseans feel an
affinity for Texas as our Beloved Davy
Crockett died there. I was recently
re-reading the Constitution (first time
since high school) and when I came to the
14th amendment written after the Civil War
and I couldn't help but be reminded of
Sarah Palin and your governor Rick Perry
who are referred to in section 3 of this
amendment.
It seems that congress did not want any one
who promoted "insurrection" (translate
that as 'Confederates') to serve in state or
national office unless they had retaken a
pledge of loyalty (PERFECTLY
UNDERSTANDABLE). And it seems that those
politicians who have advocated breaking up
the union or given aid or comfort to those
who advocate such are not qualified to run
for state or federal office unless
authorized by a two thirds vote of
congress. In reading this amendment I
cannot help but think that Sarah Palin, Rick
Perry, and others who have suggested or
given aid to those who suggest breaking up
the union of the United States are no longer
qualified to hold public office.
What do you or your readers think?
Dan
Birmingham. Alabama
Susan,
I am ready to start a petition to have Gov.
Goodhair removed on the basis of the 14th
Amendment. Thank you, Dan. Love those Vols,
not only for David Crockett, but also
because a goodly part of my ancestry is
composed of folks who wound up in Texas for
various and sundry reasons.
Shrivelin' in sunny Wimberley,
Mickey
Where do
we have the organizin' meeting for this
sucker? I would suggest the front
porch of the Governor's Mansion but I
suspect he's got that filled with old
washing machines by now.
And they are in my favorite color - shiny!
Thank you, Kathy.
July 28 - Well,
hell, at least he knew it was one of them there
countries where they dress funny and talk that crazy
moon-man language.
Fighting for the F22, the airplane that nobody wants,
Cornyn said ---
“It (the F-22 program)
is important to our national security because we’re
not just fighting wars in Afghanistan and Iraq,”
Texas’ Republican Senator John Cornyn said in a TV
interview. “We’re fighting we have graver threats
and greater threats than that: From a rising India,
with increased exercise of their military power;
Russia; Iran, that’s threatening to build a nuclear
weapon; with North Korea, shooting intercontinental
ballistic missiles, capable of hitting American
soil.”
Well, hell, you can't expect a man to keep all them
foreign countries straight - there's so damn many of
them.
Turns out that Cornyn meant China instead of India.
At least that's what he says now.
To all you folks from foreign states, I would just like
to say that we here in Texas are proud to provide you
with such high quality entertainment. It ain't
cheap, but it's good.
July 28 - My
buddy Carl Whitmarsh sent out this picture that came
from the Harris County Republican Party newsletter.
Personally, I thought it was Bald White Guy Night at the
AARP meeting.
The newsletter says they are going to do Facebook
training. Oh Lord, we should get some great
information from that.
Susan-
Geez, I
haven't seen that many middle-aged white
guys in one room since the last
"All-You-Can-Eat Prime Rib" Night at
Sweetwater Country Club.
A
co-worker and I took a closer look at the
pic (after we finished giggling) and
couldn't help but notice that figure
standing in front of the flag in the corner
(see circle below). It looks like one of
those life-size cardboard dolls. If so, of
who? My money is that it's Dubya...makes
perfect sense that this bunch would be
looking backwards, longing for "the good ol'
days".
Kelly Bee
Oh...so NOW they want to figure out
the Internets and the Google.
They are
sooo screwed....not complaining
though...hehe
Norma
July 27 - I
don't care who you are -
this is funny.
It's the First 100 Days of the Obama Administration per
Slate on Facebook.
AZLE,
Texas - A "Hispanics Keep Out" sign
displayed on the front of an Azle
home has stirred up unease for some
residents in the Tarrant County
neighborhood.
Now please correct me if I am wrong but
this reeks of irony. Wasn’t Texas Tejas?
Part of Mexico? And therefore the land
was taken from the “Hispanics”?
So maybe if the olden time “Hispanics”
put signs in their yards “No Gringos!”
they could have kept the “Immigrants”
out?
Carol
Susan-
OK,
now I'm confused...to whom is that that
"Hispanics Keep Out" sign referring to?
What, in this particular case,
constitutes an "Hispanic"?
Is it
referring to people with Spanish
surnames? Does that mean Filipinos
can't come in?
Is it
referring to people from Latin
countries? If so, which ones? Does that
mean King Juan Carlos of Spain can't
come in?
Can
people of Latin ancestry born in the
United States come in, or do they have
to stay outside too? Guess I'd better
break the news to my wife.
Is it
referring to people who speak Spanish?
That means my blond, blue-eyed
half-Mexican 3-year old granddaughter
won't be allowed in.
What a pity...the lady seemed like such
a nice, friendly sort of person, too.
Gov. Rick Perry, raising
the specter of a showdown with the Obama
administration, suggested Thursday that he would
consider invoking states’ rights protections under
the 10th Amendment to resist the president’s
healthcare plan, which he said would be "disastrous"
for Texas.
He still wants to secede from the union. God love
him, he's trying to put his foot down when it's stuck in
his mouth.
Ms Susan,
This story showed up on Crooks and Liars (http://crooksandliars.com/)
yesterday too; shows that people in foreign
states notice this stuff. Rick Perry's name
recognition is going to be right up there
with Dracula's. When the Senate defeated an
amendment for concealed carry permit
reciprocity last week, there was talk about
not letting Texas write gun laws for the
rest of the country. The swine flu might
sneak up on us again, but maybe Americans
are learning that crazy is contagious.
One can print out cards and faxes from
this website --- to send to our
congressional reps --- who lack "a
backbone", and are spineless.
We could flood Harry Reid's office with
them.
Evelyn
Oh yeah, I've already got mine printed out.
July 26 - I'm
home from the Texas Democratic County Chairs Association
meeting in Austin this weekend. It was great to
see so many good friends, like ---
Judge Susan Criss of
Galveston and Kay Sweat, County Chair of Lee County and
SDCE member.
These are two Get It Done women who are determined to
make the Democratic Party the majority Party in Texas.
Also, they both tell great stories that can cause you to
spit up a sip of wine in a very unladylike fashion.
I am proof of that.
And then there's some fellas who are almost fun to see
--
That's John Burleson, husband of my beloved friend
Evelyn Burleson; Wally Kronzer, a great guy who is
running for the 14th Court of Appeals; Bubba; and Joe
King, County Chair of Wharton County.
Tom Schieffer
posing for pictures with some admirers at a luncheon he
threw for the county chairs. I do not know who
that guy is in the lower right front of this picture,
but I certainly wouldn't want to be related to him.
State Party Chairman Boyd Richie and his wife, DNC
member Betty Richie, also attended the luncheon and gave
the crowd a rousing speech to be prepared for a a new
day in Texas. Democrats can.
And Texas Attorney General candidate
Barbara Ann
Radnofsky came by to thank the county chairs for all
their hard work.
All in all, it was one of the best workshops I've been
to in ages. There was loads of information
presented in an organized and practical manner.
By the way, combined primaries are not, not, not
acceptable. Don't do it.
July 24 - It's
also toon Friday, so thank you Clay Bennett --
Seeing
Glenn Beck's latest stunt showing
the American Flag after he removed all
the stars except for one, which
presumably symbolizes First Quitter
Sarah Palin's Alaska sovereignty
statement, makes me wonder if Glenn,
Sarah, Rick Perry and the rest of the
secessionists have ever said the Pledge
Of Allegiance. You think that somehow
they forgot the part about "One nation,
indivisible, with liberty and justice
for all"?
Well, if
they didn't forget it, then they should
be called upon to publicly renounce
their pledge.
These
(fill in the blank, I don't want to get
in trouble with your Momma) love their
country so much they are willing to
secede to save it, or bear arms to
overthrow it.
And they
are the direct descendants of the people
who tried to shout me down during
Vietnam War protests with "My country,
right or wrong". Their patriotism ends
with their self interest.
July 23 - We
have been waiting for universal health care in the
country since Harry S Truman. The Republicans say
we're rushing.
They can kiss my shiny hiney.
And the Blue Dogs can get in line behind them.
I've had it.
And I've had it with Harry Reid. He needs to
either kick butt and take names or stand aside and let
somebody else do it.
I've just had it.
I'm with you,
Susan. My message to the slackers and Blue
Dogs is....PUCKER UP, BUTTERCUP!!
Sharon
Count me
in the "Fed-Up" crowd. Please post any
news worthy info on your non-blog. I am
boycotting TeeVee news. The re-emergence of
the " Birth Certificate" story put me over
my limit on stupidity for the summer - maybe
the rest of the year!
CL
July 23 - Now
I'm not saying that anybody over at the sheriff's
department is nippin' at something in the
evidence
room, but I sure do hope that whoever wrote this "Media
Alert" wasn't driving immediately "afore" or after they
punched the computer keys.
Click the little one to get the big one.
They say it's written in English, but you sure couldn't
get it past my 8th grade English teacher, Miss Hawkins.
I personally think it was written with a Ouija board and
a gallon of Boone's Farm Blueberry Delight.
Look, Boys, admit it. You ate bullets for
breakfast
and shot off your mouth to the teevee station and
the local media. I don't care if you were right -
you handled it poorly. As the last great sheriff
we had, Gus George, used to say, "It not only has to be
right, it has to look right."
You screwed up a teevee interview. Apologize and
move on. Quit holding press conferences and get
out there and catch the bad guys.
Cripes! I guess I have to admit that Bev Carter
is right. Milton Wright is just goofy.
UPDATE: Well, the press showed up for the
conference - teevee cameras abounding and a couple dozen
deputies in the room because they apparently don't have
anything better to do -- and the sheriff called off the
press conference. He announced that he'll meet
with the parents of the victim.
Goofy.
OMG! I'm fluent in three languages, and
have no clue what this says. And this
was RELEASED? Did the press make fun
of it?
OIVAY!
Kary
The language in the release
reminds me of the Nigerian bank scam
emails: "I am pleased to announce
you..."
It won't fit on the page on my website, but the dare
will.
July 22 - We get
email reminding us that the birthers aren't the only nut
cases out there --
Hi Susan,
I just
thought you might like to read a letter
that was written to the editor of my
local paper (www.redding.com
The Record Searchlight - the second
letter). While I don't know this
person, he is representative of quite a
few people in this community, at
least according to the letters printed
in the paper. It just made me sad
(mad??) when I read it that someone
could actually sign their name to that
hateful missive!
Cronkite: Simply a traitor
In 1964,
I was introduced to Cronkite via
hard intel that was circulating
throughout Special Forces that he
was not reporting properly on the
war in Vietnam. This was an
understatement and what this person
did should have landed him in prison
with Jane Fonda as a traitor, or
better yet, in front of a firing
squad.
He had
phony credibility manufactured by
CBS, and with that power reported on
the Vietnam War and fueled the
anti-war and radical racial nuts
that were destroying our country.
Both groups killed our soldiers,
both in the United States and in
Vietnam, through their actions.
Over the
years, while I served in Vietnam and
then back in the States, I learned
to hate Cronkite more than any man I
had ever known. I watched or
listened to barefaced lies,
reporting that I knew, because I was
"there," was false, twisted,
manipulated by him to make America
come apart at the seams. I would
scream at the TV: "Why are you
saying that? That is a lie. Why are
you doing this?"
How soon
we forget!
I say
good riddance. He did not serve my
country as he is being depicted
since his death.
Those of
us who knew what a flake and phony
he was will hate him to our graves
for his communist propaganda and
what he did to America during the
Vietnam War.
I
rejoice in knowing that Cronkite and
McNamara are both in hell.
Major
John E. Cleckner Sr.
We are having a cooling trend
today! Only 103.
Sharon B.
Redding, CA
Regarding the IGNORANT
Vietnam Vet prick:
I, too was in Vietnam....was
against the war before I went
(mother BEGGED me to go to
Canada!)...while I was there,
and MUCH more when I got back.
The war was a mistake, and
anyone who thinks it wasn't is
an idiot. But then most
Republicans are idiots.....take
that back. ALL Republicans are
idiots. The decent ones stopped
being a Republican about 8 years
ago.
Love,
Kary
July 22 -
Bubba was talking to a local Republican candidate
yesterday, telling her that she's crazy to be a
Republican because every expert in Texas knows that
Fort Bend is going blue.
She nutted-up and said that she firmly believes that if
Barack Obama is reelected, it will be the end of
democracy in this country.
And the truly shocking part is that she did not appear
to be drooling when she said it, but she did come close
to fitting the legal description of insanity in 17
states, the District of Colombia, and Peru.
I do not know where this woman was during the past 8
years, but apparently Rush Limbaugh has a holding cell
for Republican women.
George Bush bankrupted the country, did away with the
rule of law, took food out of the mouths of poor little
children and gave Dick Cheney the right to torture your
grandmother.
And while Bubba's story was still fermenting in my
mind, my friend TK
sent me this ----
Teenage pregnancies and
syphilis have risen sharply among a generation of
American school girls who were urged to avoid sex
before marriage under George Bush's
evangelically-driven education policy, according to
a new report by the US's major public health body.
George Bush - the gift that just keeps on giving.
Now I know that if this woman just happens by accident
to get elected this time, in 4 years when Fort Bend is
totally blue she will "see the light" and suddenly want
to be a Democrat. Not on my watch.
July 21 - And
the good-ole-boys at the sheriff's department - the same
fellas who cut their teeth with a sheriff who was do the
wild thing with a stripper charged with arson -
are having a hard time understanding that inappropriate
behavior is inappropriate
to either gender.
Two females have
admitted their roles in an assault case involving a
20-year-old man at a McDonald’s on Crabb River Road
in the Richmond area last week, and charges are
expect to be filed on them this week.
One of the girls did
bite Smith in the back and another one touched him
inappropriately, Brady said. The girls entered
Smith’s car without permission and stole a couple of
CDs and a small amount of money. (The property was
recovered, Carlson said.) No sexual assault took
place because the activities that occurred did not
meet statutory elements, Brady said.
Heck, Babe, the boys at the sheriff department would
give you their CD's and their money - all of it -
if you would just bite them or touch them
inappropriately. They pay good money for that.
And then there's this
from a few days ago --
Smith's mother told a
television reporter when sheriff deputies arrived at
the scene, they suggested that Smith should have
enjoyed the girls' sexual advance.
Brady denied the
allegation about the deputies. He told the reporter
that a surveillance video showed Smith and the girls
"seemed to be enjoying each other's company horsing
around in the restaurant." Brady had also dismissed
the bite marks to be real. The reporter said Brady
refused to share the footage with her.
However, Brady in a
subsequent interview with the station said one girl
confessed to biting Smith and the other admitted to
groping him. The District Attorney's office is
handling the case, according to the report.
Smith wants the girls
fired from the job, deputies reprimanded and an
apology from Brady. Brady said no way.
And there's this.
And this. Y'all, we have put up with redneck
testosterone overload law enforcement since before the
frost melted off hell.
Brady has announced he's running for sheriff in 3 years.
If he can't do better than this with PR, he might
consider another line of work. And considering the
tone of the comments after these articles, Brady might
want to start checking the want-ads.
On my way to wade the dawn surf Sunday I was
listening to Romanian news on Rice Radio.
They were getting ready for the feast of
St. Elijah there, and told how Elijah fought
against the superstitions of his day. I
thought how we could use him here. Then they
told how he now rides a chariot across the
sky, cracking his whip to drive the devil
off, bringing wind rain and thunder in his
wake. I?m liking this guy more all the time.
Regards,
Charly Hoarse
July 20 - You
wanna see a pile of crapola so big that it could hide an
elephant, and, in fact, does?
Governor
Mark Sanford apologizes to the people of South
Carolina.
I think all that has
transpired will be particularly relevant in the way
I deal with the legislative body and other state
leaders going forward. Micah 6:8 asks us to do
justice, love mercy, and walk humbly, and as I begin
these steps into the last 18 months of this
administration, it will indeed be with a more
contrite and humble spirit.
Let me see if I have this straight: he shoved
scripture in our faces to prove his moral superiority
before he got caught and then uses scripture to further
his political career after he gets caught? I don't
know the name for that psychological disorder but I'll
bet it's real long and in Latin and contains the word
Pharisee somewhere in it.
And then to prove this guy is living in a double
barreled sin joint,
his emails show that he wasn't the man he was
pretending to be:
E-mails released by Gov.
Mark Sanford’s office show an administration that is
concerned about its image, coordinates its message
with a close group of former staffers and is not
afraid to play hardball with political opponents.
So, I'm telling you all this to ask a question:
Don't y'all think that the entire Republican Party owes
Bill Clinton a big ole apology?
Republicans
aren't perfect, just forgiven.
Democrats aren't perfect, and will burn in
hell.
Brian
July 18 -
This is very cool.
MB sent me a picture of why Texas is so danged hot right
now. Apparently we Texans have hacked-off Satan so
bad that he's making appearances on the weather map.
Sorry
to be the one to break it to you,
but the "weather" photo that you
posted was obviously photo shopped.
I looked at it under pretend
magnification and it is a fake
fake. When I googled "Satan+Weather+Texas"
I found the unaltered, original
photo which I have attached.
It is indeed Satan breathing his
rancid breath over our Great State,
but not the fake evil that was
foisted upon you in the "original"
photo. This is the real deal evil
that we all had to endure. Summer,
after summer, after summer. after
summer....
I'm not
nearly as concerned about the governor's
race and the senate race as I am about
the state Board of Education. How do we
get some reasonable people on there?
Education in Texastan is embarrassing.
Who can be persuaded to run? How can we
raise some money?
Surely
some of these Republican fools are not
in totally safe districts.
TK
July 17 - Okay,
here's the plan.
Never to be one who turns up her nose at a great free
market entrepreneurial idea, as of today I will begin
selling
my endorsements. For $5.00 cash American money, I
will endorse your opponent, which should bring you an
extra couple thousand votes.
Add 2 million tons of ego to that idea, and you have
this cool story.
The American
Conservative Union asked FedEx for a check for $2
million to $3 million in return for the group’s
endorsement in a bitter legislative dispute, then
flipped and sided with UPS after FedEx refused to
pay.
For the $2 million
plus, ACU offered a range of services that included:
“Producing op-eds and articles written by ACU’s
Chairman David Keene and/or other members of the
ACU’s board of directors. (Note that Mr. Keene
writes a weekly column that appears in The Hill.)”
The conservative
group’s remarkable demand — black-and-white proof of
the longtime Washington practice known as “pay for
play” — was contained in a private letter to FedEx ,
which was provided to POLITICO.
Babe, they've gotten so used to this that they're
doing it in the middle of the road. They put
it in writing. Dadburnit, that takes some
gall.
When our own Republican County Commissioner Andy Meyers
sells out, at least he has the common courtesy to
send it as an invitation to hear him speak at a
breakfast. Hell, for 2 million dollars, he'd
throw in some croissants and a prayer book.
July 17 - I
don't actually speak Republican, but I think I might be
beginning to catch on a little. Apparently the
term "bible study" is what the rest of the world refers
to as booty call.
The wife of former Rep.
Chip Pickering (R-Miss.) has filed a
complaint in a Mississippi circuit court
alleging that Pickering had an extramarital
affair while serving in Congress and that
his decision not to seek retiring Sen. Trent
Lott’s (R) seat followed an ultimatum from
his mistress.
Leisha Pickering filed an
alienation of affection complaint July 14
that alleges her estranged husband conducted
an affair with Elizabeth Creekmore-Byrd of
Jackson, Miss., while living in the C
Street complex in Washington, D.C.
It's in Roll Call (subscription only).
If you're not following
Rachel Maddow about The Family on C Street,
you're missing more fun than greased pig wrestling.
These Super DeLux Brand Christian Congressjerks have
a bible in one hand and a boob in the other.
The C
Street Christians are sounding more like the
Muslim Terrorists all the time. Only
difference is that the terrorists are
promised virgins if they blow themselves and
assorted targets up. The C Streeters get
hanky-panky now and blow up their political
careers later.
Gramiam
Susan - I
think they've got this thing all wrong.
It's not a bible study group. It's the
Best Lil' Whorehouse in Revelations.
HeyZeus
July 16 - Brian A. is my new best friend because
he
sent
me the Glenn Beck ringtone for my iPhone. Of course, I'll share.
Now y'all have fun with this and try your hardest not
to scare any little children or Republicans - they both
scare real easily and operate on about the same mental
and emotional maturity level.
I also think this mp3 could helpful in proving that PMS
ain't got diddle squat on FCS - FOX Commentator
Syndrome.
July 16 - Our
friend Alfredo has been having fun keeping up with Texas
Congressvarmint
Randy Neugebauer and his yacht.
Come to find out, the yacht might be the least of
Randy's worries.
A wealthy UBS private
banking client whose yacht company caters to Russian
oligarchs, Kuwaiti royals and other global
jet-setters, pleaded guilty on Tuesday to tax fraud,
the second American caught in a widening
investigation of the Swiss banking giant.
I mean, that practically makes them second cousins in
yachting circles. Of course, they probably
wouldn't know that out in West Texas - where it hasn't
freakin' rained since Noah's flood.
Randy, Randy. You've got UBS helping to buy you a
yacht - that officially makes you so crooked that you
have to screw on your socks in the morning.
In rural Mexico, where the towns are too
small to have a junior high school, or it's
too far to bus the kids, you'll find these "telesecodarias"
with teachers in Mexico City giving classes
by internet or satellite feed. Mexican
politicians and governors are at least as
crazzzy as Texas ones, but at least they
don't put craaaaaazzzzzy people in charge of
the schools.
Whisper it softly, but Texas looks set to become a
Democratic state
And most observers believe Fort Bend will be the next
large county to go Democratic.
Thanks for the heads-up to my Texas Born friend Kary
who's living in Baltimore and will not come home until
we turn Texas blue. Pack your bags, Kary, because
it's coming.
July 15 - In
news that hurts your head to see side-by-side -----
In a sign of lingering
hardship,
more than 15,000 Texans will lose their
unemployment checks at the end of the month because
they have exhausted their benefits after 59 weeks
without a job.
And ---
This morning's Politico
carries a special section on climate change
legislation that mentions the top beneficiaries of
the energy industry's
2008 campaign cycle donations. The oil and gas
sector -- with perhaps the most to lose from the
legislation -- gave the most. Top beneficiary:
Senator John Cornyn, with $667,600.
Or ---
Kay Bailey Hutchison
said Monday that she's raised $6.7 million in the
first half of the year for her Republican primary
challenge to Gov. Rick Perry.
There's just something obscene about money politics.
Hutchison once appeared
to be the favorite in her primary fight against
Perry, but it's not clear if that's any longer the
case. The polling in this race has been a little bit
sketchy, but seems to point toward momentum in
Perry's direction. After trailing in the five
previous polls of the race (including internal polls
conducted by his campaign and by Hutchison's), Perry
has pulled ahead in the last three:
Yes siree Bob, Texas Republican have a very firm grip on
crazy and they ain't lettin' go till cows give beer
because then they'll have to refocus all their efforts
into killin' cows.
Rumor has it that Sarah Palin would come down here to
campaign for Rick Perry and that Perry will try to steal
Palin's pumps and adorable little Valentino jackets.
Aw, come on, give it up. Everybody knows Rick
Perry likes to play dress-up. And that he's a bit
of a powder puff.
Anyway, the Republicans are playing tease with this
one, and I think it's real mean of them to get all our
hopes up for the best show not under a big tent.
Bet his boyfriend don't think he's all
talk
Charles
Susan, I think it's time to reel
in the "Perry as a
cross-dresser" rumors and bring
it back down to Earth.
Perry has always been
a bit player in this
reality-based drama, and will
never be headline material,
regardless of his sweat soaked
chaps. Everyone who knows
anyone knows who the real stars
are.
USexpat
Susan
How dare you suggest that
Rick Perry is not a manly man.
That's what Republican woman are
for!
I wish I had taken the camera with me.
Today, on the outskirts of Atoka,
Oklahoma (the reddest state in American,
where every
county went red in '08) I passed by what
my charitably be referred to as an
antiques store. Outside was a
hand-painted sign that said:
Sarah Palin
American Woman
I don't
doubt that the endorsement was genuine.
But I couldn't help but think of the
Guess Who song from the 60s, "American
Woman". No YouTube videos of the Guess
Who so here is Lenny Kravitz performing
the same song with the lyrics shown for
those with memory problems.
July
14 - Y'all, I thank the Good Lord that he let me
live long enough to see The Kay and Rick Show.
Here's just a sampling from today's
Dallas Morning News.
Hutchison's accusations
kick off a war of words with Perry rep
"She looked into the
camera and lied to the people of Texas," Miner said.
"The weak finance
numbers by the senator continue to show a campaign
in disarray," Miner said.
Hutchison said she was
excited about her fundraising total and implied that
Perry was all talk, no action.
Asked later about her
tough words for Perry, Hutchison swung a shadow
punch through the air. "We're going to win," she
said. "I'm taking no prisoners."
And, Honey, they were just arguing about money.
Think how much fun this is going to get when they start
arguing about God, guns, and gays.
Friends, if you're smart like me, today you'll go into
training for gasps and laughter to fully enjoy this
race. It's gonna be meaner than hell with the hide
off.
Thankfully, Dr. Richard
Stephens and his team at Keele University in the
United Kingdom just published a study that says
swearing actually has a pain-lessening effect. (See
Mom? It’s healthy!) When we swear, we increase our
threshold for pain, meaning we can bear it longer
and don’t feel it as much. Stephens is not sure why
this happens, only that for some reason, “swearing
appears to increase our pain tolerance.”
I have a theory, just a theory, that goes like this --
the reason that the Super DeLux Brand Religious Zealots
always look like they've just stumped their toe is
because they don't say dammit near enough.
I also have a theory that in Texas, bullcrap is not a
cuss word. It's an agribusiness term. Hell,
we even have
a
song about bullcrap. I think that's what makes
Texans friendly.
Like I said, it's just a theory, but it's a good one.
July 13 - If
you ever have a pesky $2 million laying around taking up
space you need for your toadstool
collection,
Texas Governor Rick Perry is your go-to man. Dude, Governor Perry can make $2 million disappear
faster than double geared lightening. Take a lookie
right about here --
Gov.
Rick Perry's border Web camera program has run out
of money, and in its first full year of operation
failed to meet nearly every law enforcement goal.
Last year, Perry gave
the Texas Border Sheriffs Coalition a $2 million
federal grant to install cameras along the
U.S.-Mexico border and broadcast the footage live
over the Internet. An internal report showed that a
fraction of the 200 cameras Perry wanted on the
border were installed, and that Internet border
patrollers produced a handful of drug busts and a
scattering of arrests.
Experts on both sides
of the immigration issue said the program was
unsuccessful. Certain lawmakers have called it a
waste.
So, Jim Bob wanted to sit around in his underdrawers,
drinking beer, watching the border on his internet
machine (between hits to porn sites, of course) and then
call the pooolice when he saw Debbie Sue's yardman come
across from visiting his family? Hell, that ain't no waste. That's $2 million
worth of entertainment. Think of the money you
saved Jim Bob on porn sites!
But interviews
and reports the El Paso Times obtained indicate the
nearly 125,000 "virtual Texas deputies" registered
on the site led law enforcement to just eight drug
busts and 11 arrests.
Okay, so that's 19 arrests for $2 million. Honey,
I did the math and that turns out to be $53,000 per
arrest. If we had just paid the drug mules and the domestic
workers $53,000 each, they would have stayed at home and
saved us the trouble. State Senator Eliot Shapleigh of El Paso summed it up
nicely ---
Shapleigh said money
that has been spent on cameras would be better used
to fund investigative work by the Texas Department
of Public Safety to stop drug cartels that are
fueling violence on both sides of the border.
"Border cameras," he
said, "are about political pandering, not real
border security."
Ya think? Governor Perry pandering? Aw gees,
I hate to hear that.
I
think the same dimwits that ran the
border cam scam ran this program:
AUSTIN (AP) - Another 16,000
steroids tests of Texas public high
school athletes caught eight
cheaters.
The
University Interscholastic League on
Friday released the latest results
of the 2-year-old program. They show
that about 45,000 total tests have
confirmed 19 cases of steroids use.
Given so
few positive results, state
lawmakers have agreed to scale it
back over the next two years. The
Legislature slashed spending for the
program from $6 million to $2
million.
There's no money for worker safety
and Perry has to borrow money for
unemployment (after he turned down
Federal $$) but we gotta keep those
kids from using steroids.
Contrary to White
House wishes, Attorney General Eric Holder may push
forward with a criminal investigation into the Bush
administration's harsh interrogation practices used
on suspected terrorists.
Holder is considering
whether to appoint a prosecutor and will make a
final decision within the next few weeks, a Justice
Department official told The Associated Press. The
official spoke on the condition of anonymity because
he was not authorized to speak on a pending matter.
Look, I know the country is sick and tired of
investigations. I understand that.
But this not about hoochy koochy with an intern in the
Oval Office. This is about torture, lying to
Congress and lying to the American people.
The bottom line: if Dick Cheney gets away with
this, then future Veeps can, too.
There's a saying here that goes like this - you can't
get lard unless you boil the hog. Well, I think
it's time to boil the hog.
July 12 - A
buddy in Austin who raises hibiscus and hell sent me a
link about
Sara Palin's least favorite blogger. I'm glad
I'm not a blogger because it would have hurt my feelings
real bad because it wasn't me. I would pay
perfectly good cash American money to be Sarah Palin's
least favorite blogger.
You'll enjoy reading it.
July 10 - Phew!
It appears that the rumor about Rick Perry appointing
Cynthia Dunbar to the State Board of Education was just
a rumor -- apparently started by Cynthia Dunbar.
That woman needs attention more than anybody else on
earth. If the Belles of Heaven Republican Women's
Club aren't all fawning over her and keeping her in
their hourly prayers, then she's mightily unhappy.
The Quorum Report is saying that Perry has given the
job to the "most moderate of the remaining conservatives
on the board" - Gail Lowe.
Cynthia, I am told by semi-reliable sources, got the
news yesterday that it wasn't going to be her and she
scrambled to to find some sour grapes. Hence, the
whole I Need To Be Crazy story.
That's all I know and that's all I want to know about
Cynthia Dunbar's bitter hateful life for today.
July 10 -
Okay, this has nothing to do with politics, but
everything to do with life.
I have taken on the project of raising $4 million so I
can buy this house ---
---- and then tear it down.
Why would I want to do such a thing? Well, mosey
on over to
take a look at the inside of this house and see if
you don't agree with me.
The sellers claim that ...
Forty years of
scientific and philosophical investigation into how
best to sustain human life and how to use
architecture to help people live exceedingly long
lives has been put to good effect in this house like
no other.
You will not live a longer life in this house. It
will just feel that way because you live in such a damn
weird house.
So please contribute to my House Rehabilitation Fund so
I can buy this four million dollar sucker and put it out
of its misery.
That has to be Bruno's house.
James
Don't
you dare! I love that house,
inside and out!
John
That
house looks like my fever nightmares as
a kid. I would tell you anything rather
than be forced to remain in that house.
Carol
Where's the bathroom? I want to
see the bathroom. Now.
Hey
Zeus
Even
if I had that kind of money I wouldn't
give $4 for that. Looks like someone
stuck a bunch of boxes together, painted
it all different colors with leftover
cans of paint and then couldn't even put
in a real floor.
Mike
Stripper poles in a potato field?
What kind of vacuum cleaner would you
use?
Teri
Hey
Zeus:
From the look of the pictures the whole
thing is a giant catbox.
Mark in Oregon
Hi
Susan,
Yikes, that house brings new meaning
to the Thomas Tusser quote "A fool
and his money are soon parted"!
Sharon B.
Redding, CA
As it is in NY, I guess it
doesn't have a view of
Russia....
Dave in La Verne, CA
Dear Susan,
I believe the proper way to
handle this is to lie about your
income and get one of those
phony Notary stamps that make it
look like you're someone else
(one of you lies, the other
swears to it). Now you can get
a mortgage on that baby. Leave
the doors open so that the rain
and the birds, cats, squirrels,
raccoons, opossums, and other
small creatures can have the run
of the place. For good measure,
become a cat and dog hoarder and
let at least one room function
as the litter box for the cats
while another is the kennel for
the dogs. After not making
payments for a few months, claim
you have been mailing them to a
different address. This will
stall a while longer. By the
time they finish foreclosing on
your phony personality, no one
will want the house and they'll
have to destroy it.
Don A in Pennsyltucky where
that behavior isn't all that
uncommon. I had a neighbor who
never let the dog out of the
house. Come to think of it, I
had a neighbor like that in New
York, too.
“I would have to
cease making and arguing motions in order to sit as
chair,” Dunbar said in an e-mail response to
questions Thursday. “This is a vitally important
activity and something at which I have been very
effective. Numerous substantive actions have been
taken by the board based upon my motions and I would
be forced to play a less active and less vocal role
if I were to serve as chair.”
Dunbar said it is
“simply the nature of the position” that would
prevent her from being vocal if she were to become
president of the board.
“I intend to be very vocal about the danger and
constitutional impropriety of National Standards;
being chair could potentially inhibit my ability to
be outspoken on such issues,” she said.
Damn - that's even better than Sarah Palin's goofy
reasons for resigning. I mean, that would be like
Sarah saying, "Well, I'd like to be Governor but then I
can't run around nakkid punching kittens in the face."
ADDED: You know, I got thinking about this last
night. You kinda have to admire a woman who would
turn down a high-power position because it would get in
the way of her crazzzytime.
I'm not sure that I would be willing to give up a
position that could improve the education of all Texas
schoolchildren and have positive results for generations
to come. I would be giving up a chance to produce
another Jonas Salk or John Glenn just so I could
continue a path to Locoville.
I mean, you gotta really have to love being crazzzy to
make the decision that Cynthia made. My clown hat
is off to her!
I am so
glad she pulled her name out. She fully
realizes that if she gets ANY position
that has any power, she won't be able to
work in the shadows trying to warp the
minds of children.
James
Mark
Twain on school boards --
"First
God made idiots, that was for practice.
Then He made school boards."
Mike
July 9 - So, I
get an email from my Geek today and it does nothing to
help me feel better about the condition of the world and
my place in it.
Susan,
Now you can say that you’ve been
attacked by the North Koreans. KMBBB, FBD
and many more websites were on some of the many
servers that were affected by the attack…
FYI,
David
Well darn. That's just creepy. I mean, I
hadn't even insulted them - yet.
On the other hand, I have gone out of my way to insult
Rupert Murdoch, so if my name is not
on that list, I'm gonna be plenty upset, dammit.
I've worked hard and earned a place on that list.
July 8 - Sorry,
I can't help myself. Thank you, Mike Luckovich ---
Alberto Gonzales, who
resigned as the Bush administration’s embattled
attorney general nearly two years ago, has lined up
a fall-semester teaching spot at Texas Tech
University, the university confirmed today.
Please tell me it's not law. Please tell me it's
art history or performance music or even biology - just
not law. Oh please, not law. Anything but
law ......
Gonzales ... will be
working as an visiting professor in the political
science department, teaching a “special topics”
course on contemporary issues in the executive
branch.
Oh crap.
He's gonna teach Texas Tech college students how to
shove the Constitution up their hineys and pretend it
never existed. Is there a professorship open for
the "How To Screw The American People And Never Go To
Jail" course? I mean, he'd be perfect for that.
You folks from foreign states need to know that this
was a good-ole-boy payback and is exactly what
happens when you let a political hack be chancellor of a
university.
He also disputed reports
he was having a hard time finding work, saying he’s
working as a consultant, giving speeches and doing
arbitration work as a lawyer. He said then that his
dream job would be baseball commissioner.
Oh Crap. Baseball doesn't have enough problems
already? It needs Gonzales' help to get a 21%
approval rating?
Honey, a Texas University needs Alberto Gonzales as
much as a skunk needs a catfish in it's back pocket to
provide more stink.
Oh crap.
Dear Susan,
Just think of the guest lecturers that
BertieGonzo can call upon to do his talking
for him in class. I mean, after he starts
answering questions, he's going to need some
help with that quirky memory of his. If
people like Rove, Feist, Cheney, Rumsfeld,
and the like start being reminded that if
Bertie is forced to do too much thinking, he
might start remembering where the skeletons
are buried and if that happens they'll be
only too happy to show up and create a wind
such as Lubbock hasn't seen since 1970.
Don A in Pennsyltucky.
Is the author of that Press Release (?)
a graduate? If Gonzales approved
it...well, I can only hope that his
"special topics" do not involve English
or Grammatical courses.
"...will be working as an
visiting professor in the political
science department, teaching a “special
topics” course on contemporary
issues..."
AMI
In the
words of Mac Davis: "Happiness is
Lubbock, Texas in my rearview mirror."
Or to paraphrase Willie:
'Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to
be Red Raiders...'
Sorry, Susan. You have my sympathy.
Y'all don't deserve this. You might have
to cut off the panhandle...will Oklahoma
take it? I know New Mexico
won't.
Love, Fran
"Special course" I think translates in
Butt-Kissing Toady 101.
Mike
How
does one teach, when one cannot recall?
Just asking.
Kathy
I am
so embarrassed that Texas Tech would
hire alberto " I don't recall"
gonzales. The man is not qualified
to teach anything after his last
disastrous job. To think Tech just
raised tuition again, so this idiot
can get paid $100,000 to "teach" one
seminar and recruit minority
students.
Run
students Run!
I
emailed my nephews who both attend
Tech and advised them not to take
his class. If they happen to skip
class--he might torture them!
I am
taking the Texas Tech license plate
covers off my car. Putting up my
"guns" (not real ones--Tech fans
know what I am talking about), until
they get rid of alberto.
Such
a sad day for Texas Tech University!
Dolores
Texas Tech University Chancellor
Kent Hance confirmed Tuesday
that former U.S. Attorney General
Alberto Gonzales will teach a course
at Tech next fall.
Anonymous sources in the Department
of Neuroscience say that
Gonzales will teach classes on the
encoding, storage, and retrieval of
memories.
This is a funny turnabout for
long-time George W. Bush
mouthpiece Gonzales as Kent Hance is
the only man to ever successfully
beat Bush in an election. He did it
in 1978 in the Texas 19th
Congressional District by telling
voters that Bush was not a real
Texan, and by plastering the
windshields of tee totaling Texas
churchgoers with phony invitations
to a Bush campaign beer blast. Bush
said afterwards that he wasn't going
to be out-Christianed or
out-good-old-boyed again.
Hance switched to the Republican
Party in 1985, after seeing
Phil Gramm parlay his party-jump
into a U.S. Senate seat in 1984.
After running unsuccessfully several
times for higher office, he
was appointed to the Tech position
by the Rick Perry appointed Board
of
Regents in 2006.
Charly Hoarse
July 7 -
What is a tad more disturbing than knowing that Big
Pimping Inc. has a place of bidness in your hometown?
Knowing that Big Pimping Inc is having a Back-to-School
sale.
July 7 -
Well, Captain IQ Sarah Palin, has pulled one on me.
Y'all, there's a Department of Law and I didn't even
know about it. Damn, imagine my embarrassment.
Here I am, a fancy non-blogger in intellectual rural
Texas, and I didn't even know there was a Department of
Law.
When asked how she could handle the rigors of being President
with all the ethics charges that go with that office
when she couldn't even handle it as Governor,
Sarah had this wise answer ---
Palin said there is a
difference between the White House and what she has
experienced in Alaska. If she were in the White
House the "department of law" would protect her from
baseless ethical allegations.
"I think on a national level your department of law
there in the White House would look at some of the
things that we've been charged with and
automatically throw them out," she said.
I dunno
for sure, but I betcha that Bill Clinton would have
liked to have known about that!
By the way, Lil' Bubba says he wished he known, too,
because he would have applied for a job with them.
How cool would be it be to say, "I'm here with the
Department of Law and I have a few questions for you."
Dude, that's Paul Newman cool.
July 7 - Arizona State
Senator Sylvia Allen explains why she's for bringing
uranium storage to Arizona. "The world is 6,000
years old", she says, but hell, who's counting?
Obviously not Senator Allen.
"The earth has been here for 6,000 years - long before
anybody had environmental laws - and somehow it hasn't
been done away with," she says.
Okay, so I'm supposed to trust the judgment of someone
who thinks that God hid dinosaur bones just to jack with
us?
Arizona Progressives have given Sylvia Allen
front runner status for the "Tinfoil Hat and
Cherry Kool-Aid award". And you Texans and
Alaskans thought you had an exclusive on
wingnuts!
Gramiam
It isn't
just Texas, Alaska, and Arizona that have
their share of wingnuts. Minnesota has
arguably the nuttiest of all in Michele
Bachmann.
July 6
- Brian found us a killer video of Sarah Palin
saying that Hillary Clinton should not do what Sarah
Palin is doing right now.
As Brian says, Sarah needs some help with the practice
versus preach thingy.
World's Worst Job:
Editor of Sarah
Palin’s upcoming book.
Regards,
Jim
What
kinda whine is served best with Wolf
de' Whop-Whop and Field Dressed
Moose ala Point Guard?
I've listened to your Yoo-Tubular
thing and the one thing that Sarah
seems to drive home with confidence,
commitment, and fort-ti-tude is when
she says "It-Thick" at 0:41. I
played it backwards with a fundy
filter and she clearly says, "I
quit!", thereby prophetilizing her
current gubernatorial status.
We really, really need to get
Sarah to move to Texas to join our
homegrown variety of wingnuts. She
is one in a couple of dozen and
deserves all the attention that she
is whining about.
USexpat
July 6 - They
booed Senator John Cornyn. They booed
him.
Because even they understand that crackpot is crackpot
no matter how much fringe you put on it.
U.S. Sen. John Cornyn
drew boos from a crowd outside the Texas Capitol
this afternoon as he spoke at a “tea party” rally
organized by the Texas office of Americans for
Prosperity.
Cornyn was booed at
the start and close of his remarks, which assailed
actions in Washington; there were no boos while he
awarded a Purple Heart to a Copperas Cove resident
injured in Iraq in 2006.
“You’re the problem,”
a crowd member hollered.
Another crowd member
yelled that Cornyn voted for the initial federal
bailout of Wall Street approved by Congress last
year, the Troubled Asset Relief Program.
I promise you one thing: these teabaggers are
going to hurt the Republican Party far more than they
will hurt us. In that way, I certainly encourage
them to go about their work.
July 6 - Well, I
guess calling us socialists didn't scare people enough,
so the Texas far right has a new term for us -
the pagan left.
In response to the question of "How crazzzy would your
Governor have to be to name Cynthia Dunbar head of the
State Board of Education?" there's this answer --
“It would certainly
cause angst among the same members of the pagan left
that rejected Don McLeroy because he was a man of
faith,” said David Bradley, R-Beaumont, one of the
seven socially conservative members on the 15-person
board.
The pagan left. That is pretty darn cool.
That means we can get nakkid and dance around Stonehenge
when Hillary Clinton and Barbra Streisand give the
signal.
Cynthia Dunbar is not a woman of faith - she is a woman
of disturbed. She's never gotten over why her
husband left her, so she taking it out on helpless
little children.
Cynthia - if you're reading this - all your sweet
rightwing Super DeLux Brand Christian girlfriends gossip
wildly about you behind your back. In the name of
"she needs our prayers," the Belles of Heaven Republican
Women's Club has eviscerated you all over this county.
Hon, at least the witches on the pagan left admit
they're witches.
It would
appear that the bloggers of Alaska aren't
the only ones with cojones! Maybe Texas is
getting ready for the Rapture, Texas style.
That's where all the wingnuts leave and you
get to stay behind and enjoy the peace and
quiet!!
Blessed
Be,
Gramiam
Dear
Susan,
I take no exception to being called a
pagan -- growing up with 2 older brothers
teaches you that name-calling doesn't do
harm. But I do object to the notion that
every person even slightly to the right of
Ghengis Khan is some sort of un-Christian.
The mindset that comes up with a phrase like
pagan left is one that starts and ends with
the King James Version as interpreted by Tim
LaHaye, John Hagee, Jerry Falwell, and
Frances Shaeffer. They can not even form a
thought which might include the slightest
inkling that other people can disagree with
them without being tools of Satan. When it
comes to evil, people like Ms. Dunbar are
working to corner the market.
Susan, Baskin-Robins??? As a true heathen,
pagan, socialist I must protest. True
believers are followers of the Ben & Jerry's
flavors.
My own
personal flavor was Full Vermonty
(discontinued, and if I ever find out who
was responsible, their days are numbered).
B-R is a California thing I think, while B&J
has it's roots here in Vermont (The FIRST
state to give it's electoral votes to
Obama). I seem to remember Blue Bell
homemade Vanilla as being in the pantheon of
creameries and it is a Texas concern as you
well know. I toss that in just so you
won't feel neglected.
Al
(Someone who knows his ice cream)
July 4 - Y'all,
I'm on vacation so leave me the heck alone, ya hear?
I snuck off this morning to let you know that I saw
Palin's speech replayed last night and it hurt my head.
I heard another speech just like that once. I was
in college and the speaker was stoned. It was
funny then and it's funny now.
Considering Mark Sanford's latest "ultimate acts"
confession and Palin's speech, I think the GOP is taking
more drugs than Michael Jackson's doctor can supply.
The best rumor I heard is that she's being hired by Fox
News. Hummm ... she is totally ignorant of any
facts and she wears too much makeup - she'll fit in
fine. I give it six weeks before she and Bill
O'Reilly are scratching each other's eyes out.
I do know one thing about Sarah Palin - she's a big ole
pansy. She's a chicken. She lacks courage.
She cut and ran. And she gives me a headache.
So many lame
excuses. Seems like her list of complaints
about what's been happening to her and why
she had to quit- rudeness, bullying, lame
duck junkets- are the same things she's been
doing all along. If she thinks of her
position as governor as a point guard on
a basketball team, knowing when to pass the
ball so the team can win, where does the
coach fit in?
And to think almost half the country thought
her being one heartbeat away from the
presidency was okay.
Brian
My guess
is that there is something rotten in the
state of Alaska, and we're going to spend
time hearing about a major scandal involving
Palin. If I had to bet, I would bet that it
involves her house, built just before her
run for governor, but it may be even worse
than that. One thing about the Republicans,
the scandals just keep coming, world without
end, Amen.
Mah Fellow
Murkuhn
The
Quittah from Wassilla!
George
July 2 -
My buddy Richard
has discovered that the Mark Sanford autobiography has
already hit the bookstores in a neighborhood near you
---
July 2 - Oh lookie
who gave Alan Stanford his money back!
Committee: NEUGEBAUER CONGRESSIONAL COMMITTEE
Disbursement To
Address
Election Type
Date of
Disbursement
Extra Description
Amount This Period
Text
Memo
Stanford Financial Group Co Employees'
1399 New York Avenue NW Suite 375
Washington, DC 200054779
03/04/2009
Refund of Contribution
2000.00
And, rats!, it's too late for for Stanford to get a
free ride on the Fun Raiser!
July 2 - My
friend Marita found this sucker and put it on Facebook.
It appears that the Republicans are pulling out the big
guns to scare everybody about the Democratic Senate -
the metric system!
Woo -- hide the children! Tremble in your boots,
cowboy.
The metric system is
the kind of thing that you can expect from the
60-vote filibuster-proof majority Democrats now have
in the United States Senate.
After the Watergate
scandal in 1974, Democrats trounced Republicans in
the mid-term elections, getting 61 seats in the
Senate and 291 in the House.
In the Senate, they
adjusted the rules to make it harder for Republicans
to filibuster (reducing the magic number from 67 to
60 to invoke cloture, which ends debate). In the
House, they passed all kinds of reforms to take
power away from senior members and give it to junior
members. And Congress mandated that the American
people embrace the metric system.
Well, I know that makes me change my mind about voting
Democratic. Instead of being able to say that
something is "spittin' distance" from my house, I'll
have to say it's "2 meters and then some." My life
is ruined.
The
bozo who wrote the piece at CNN
that mentions the Democratic evil plan to
put us on the metric system is fact-free.
He also states in his article that Jimmy
Carter signed the 55-mph speed limit bill,
but that was Nixon.
It’s a typical
conservative mind-set to prefer a
measurement system that’s complicated,
confusing, and puts America at a competitive
disadvantage. But conservatives feel they
need to protect us from becoming like the
rest of the world. And they feel so macho
measuring in inches.
The American
military uses the metric system; what a
bunch of liberals they must be!
Regards,
Jim
The U.S.
loses millions of dollars each year
because of conversion rates (English to
metric) between us and other
countries. Since everyone else uses it
we should to. Its not that hard and we
would adjust very quickly to it. Its all
based on the number 10, how hard could
it be? I still don't get that guys
point, he is just making himself look
like a fool.
James
(Physics teacher)
Susan Babe -
Does anyone know what happened to Janet
Reno's black helicopters that the rightwing
used to try to scare us about? Did
they go metric and crash?
HeyZeus
July 1 - Thanks to
Jim, we have another adorable interview with Alaska
Governor Sarah Palin.
Yes, she whines about the way the McCain campaign
treated her. Yes, she poses suggestively with the
American flag. Yes, she works in a jab at Barack
Obama. Yes, she hauls out her kids as fashion
accessories.
But this time she also works in her thighs throbbing.
No, I'm not kidding.
Sarah Palin interviews with Runner's World Magazine.
She even posed for several pictures, God love her.
Nobody told her that when you get a fake tan on your
legs, you should also use some on your neck and your
hands because otherwise you look like you have some sort
of awful circulatory disease.
She's a piece of work and I hope she never shuts up.
She challenges Barack Obama to a game of HORSE.
How many times does he need to beat her like a redheaded
stepchild before she learns better than to mess with
him?
July 1 - Okay,
so I upgraded to the new iPhone. Up until last
week, I had the first iPhone they put out, which was
cool enough until they came out with the 3Gs.
My iPhone, among other very cool things, can talk to me
and answer my commands. I'm narrowing the list of
names for the talking chick on my iPhone.
I like Ernestine because Lilly Tomlin made her phone
skills famous. I like Blanche because, believe me,
my iPhone depends on the kindness of strangers. I
like Thelma Lucille because that's my Aunt's name and
the quintessential Texas name. And, no I cannot
name it Hal or Dave because I have friends by both those
names who would get dialed when I was just trying to
talk to my phone. There's a couple more names on
my list, so this is a decision that might take some
time.
Anyway, for a couple of years now I have been signed up
for the CNN New Alerts. I like it because it lets
me know when I needed to make a mad dash for a teevee or
internet machine. I admit it - I'm a news junkie.
However, and I'm sure that I'm not talking to the wind
here, I'm beginning to think I'm getting news alerts
from People Magazine or Teen Beat instead of CNN.
I was at lunch today and my phone beeped. We
looked at it only to see that Michael Jackson's body is
going back to Neverland for a public viewing on Friday.
Big whoop. That's something I don't even want to think
about. Look, I'm sorry he died, but toting his sad body
around doesn't count as Breaking News! to me.
Is there anywhere I can sign-up for an alert if there's
real news? If you know of a fairly serious news
alert service, please let me know.
And, if you know of any very cool aps I need, send that
along, too, because I've got 32 gigs to fill up, dammit.
I think you should call it
"Betty Lou Thelma Liz" in honor of another
famous Texas troubadour, Jerry Jeff Walker.
Betty Lou
Thelma Liz is the name of the wife in the
song "Up Against the Wall, Redneck Mother."
You could even make it one word (BettyLouThelmaLiz)
cause that's the way is pronounced in the
song.
Just a
wild @ss thought from the center of all
evil.
TTFN
Paul
Dear
Susan,
Paul has it mis-attributed. Jerry Jeff
(born in Oneonta, New York -- must have one
of those bumper stickers that says he wasn't
born in Texas but he got there as soon as he
could) didn't write "Up Against the Wall
Redneck Mother". That was Ray Wylie Hubbard
and he's an Okie.
I think you should use Sarah. Like in
the Andy Griffith Show.
Don A.
Welcome to the website formerly known as The World's Most
Dangerous Beauty Salon, Inc.
My name is
Susan DuQuesnay Bankston.
I live in Richmond, Texas, in heart of Tom DeLay's old
district. It's crazy here. No, seriously, it's
triple z crazzzy.
I used to be an independent voter, but that all changed when
I got to know a few local Republicans. They are meaner
than 10 acres of snakes and have the ethical compass of a
bank robber.
So, I
decided that they could just Kiss My Big Blue Butt.
A lot of
what I post here has to do with local politics, but you
probably have the same folks in your local government.
This ain't
a blog. Blogs are way too trendy for me. I've
been doing this since 1992, so I'm used to it even if you
ain't.
Email me
and I'll find a place to put it if I like it.
Yesterday, it was discovered that Kay is dropping little
hints in the girl's bathroom
And Kay's campaign has a perfectly logical explanation
(emphasis mine) ---
off
his mouth - has gone into the lucrative
On
behalf of my alma mater, Oklahoma State
University, I would like to express
extreme disgust and dismay that Pete
Sessions' nickname is the same as our
beloved mascot. That just ain't
right. I think the original Pistol
Pete, Frank Eaton, would be quite
dismayed to know who was sharing his
nickname! 
equal,
I would vote for a woman over a man because women have a
deeper sense of values. I used to believe that.
Until yesterday.
And they are in my favorite color - shiny!
Well, hell, you can't expect a man to keep all them
foreign countries straight - there's so damn many of
them. 
And Texas Attorney General candidate
I do not know where this woman was during the past 8
years, but apparently Rush Limbaugh has a holding cell
for Republican women. 
selling
my endorsements. For $5.00 cash American money, I
will endorse your opponent, which should bring you an
extra couple thousand votes.
sent
me the Glenn Beck ringtone for my iPhone. 
UBS
Americas Fund for Better Government
Rumor has it that Sarah Palin would come down here to
campaign for Rick Perry and that Perry will try to steal
Palin's pumps and adorable little Valentino jackets.
Aw, come on, give it up. Everybody knows Rick
Perry likes to play dress-up. And that he's a bit
of a powder puff.
Friends, if you're smart like me, today you'll go into
training for gasps and laughter to fully enjoy this
race. It's gonna be meaner than hell with the hide
off.
On the other hand, I have gone out of my way to insult
Rupert Murdoch, so if my name is not
him.
Because even they understand that crackpot is crackpot
no matter how much fringe you put on it. 
She even posed for several pictures, God love her.
Nobody told her that when you get a fake tan on your
legs, you should also use some on your neck and your
hands because otherwise you look like you have some sort
of awful circulatory disease. 
