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September 30 - My favorite columnist and Cranky Austin Dude, John Kelso, reminds me why Austin should remain weird.

In case you haven't been following along at City Hall, some City Council members want to make it illegal for panhandlers to do their thing on roads and sidewalks, and within 1,000 feet of schools.

When you stop and think about it, aren't toll roads a high-tech form of panhandling?

Besides, panhandlers working near schools is a better educational tool than Career Day. Just having the panhandlers out there looking ugly says, "This could happen to you if you don't finish your algebra homework."

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September 30 - Tom DeLay is getting all over my nerves and the news again. 
     The loneliness and lack of free golf excursions has caused him to become wildly delusional.  He's prancing around the country like he's got a lick of good sense, speaking to Young Republican groups. 
     At one stop he accused Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington of distributing Senator Larry Craig's sex-sting arrest report to distract from a scandal swirling around Democratic candidate Hillary Clinton.
     So CREW and Hillary Clinton schemed to make Larry Craig signal for hoochy-koochy in a men's restroom? 
     Okay, well, that might happen in Tom DeLay's world except for the fact that ---

Further undercutting DeLay's assertion is that reports of Norman Hsu questionable fundraising practices didn't break until a day after Roll Call broke Craig's story.

     So, not only has Tom discarded the theory of evolution, he's also going to argue with Einstein over the theory of time.
     Look, if Democrats have harnessed time and can turn back the clock and make things happen the day before they actually did, I think they would have told me about it before I had that embarrassing toilet paper stuck on my shoe incident over at the Mustang Lounge last week.  Democrats like me and they surely would have told me before they told Tom DeLay.

     But that's not all. 
     I just happen to get my hands on the DeLay  Foundation for Kids (frightening thought, huh?) tax returns for 2006.
     Guess who is still on the Board of Directors? 
     Ed Buckham.
     No, seriously.  Ed Buckham is still on the Board of Directors of the DeLay Foundation. 

     You know the drill.  Click the little one to get the big one.
     Honey, I wouldn't let Buckham near my cutting board, much less anything to do with money. 
     I wonder if the Feds know about this.

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September 28 - Okay, I just got home from the County Fair. 
     I'm not saying that the Republicans aren't proud of their President or any of their candidates, but.... Damn, Honey, the Republicans aren't proud of their President or any of their candidates.
     Take a look at this pathetic excuse for a booth on the busiest darned day of the County Fair ----

     It sat empty all day. Nobody manned it. Things were just thrown around on the table. There was a box stuck over to side with some flags crumbled-up in it.  One candidate, running for a strong Democratic seat, showed up and stood there for about 45 minutes.  He looked sad. That was it.  All day. 
     And what's the deal with Gary Gillen putting his name on the sign?  Goodness sake, even Eric Thode didn't have an ego that big.  Gary, you're an elected official - pay for your own danged sign.  Making the Party pay for your advertising is what makes Republicans look like chumps who can't stand on their own.
     I'm told by a very reliable source that the Republicans paid $200 for that sign.  The Democrats paid $80 for their's and it's a better sign, but, of course, the Democrat's sign is union made. 
     The Democratic booth was proudly manned from noon until 8:00 pm.  Most of the afternoon there were 4 people there, and we sold out of Hillary! buttons by 3:00. 

     So, if you're around Rosenberg, head on over to the Fair and visit the Democratic booth.  We have Presidential pins, rally signs, bumper stickers for Clinton, Obama, Edwards, Richardson, Biden, and Gore, and a couple of really cool baseball caps. 
     The Republicans have .... diddle squat.

     UPDATE:  Hal and I wrote about the same thing without even talking about it.  He's got more pictures and some idiotic Republican saying that their booth wasn't staffed because Republicans work for a living.  Go play nicely, now.

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September 28 - Holy smokes, we got email all the way from Ann Arbor, Michigan!

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September 28 - Okay, so this doesn't have diddle squat to do with politics, but if you're a Coen Brothers fan, you'll love Fargo in 90 seconds.
     It's a great way to start a Friday Morning!

     It's County Fair Day here.  Kids are out of school and there's a big parade down Highway 90.  I'm off to the Fairgrounds for Kettle Corn and Funnel Cake!  I'll post some pictures later today.

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September 27 - Judge Susan Criss is trying to do the durn near impossible - reform the Texas Supreme Court.  If you could toss a few dollars her way, it would be great for Texas.  We need to get the insurance company pimps off the court. 
     I know Susan and I can say this about her.  She was already ten years old and half a judge when she was born.  She'll do us proud.
     BOR has a blog entry by her today.

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September 27 - Look, we gave you all our darned oil, now you want us to glow in the dark for you?

NRG Energy will file an application with regulators on Tuesday to build two new nuclear reactors in Texas, the first such request in the United States in 29 years, the company said Monday.

The two 1,350-megawatt General Electric advanced boiling water reactors (ABWR) would join two existing reactors at the South Texas nuclear power plant in Bay City, Texas, near Houston

     Oh that's just ducky.  I move to the country and get stuck between a coal plant and a nuclear reactor. 
     Look, I can understand why you folks from foreign states hate Texas, what with Bush and Rove, and DeLay, and ... well, we get it.  However, we also gave you Ann, Molly, and Willie Nelson.  So, cut us some slack, okay?

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September 27 - Uh huh. 

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September 27 - You know, I've had it up to here with the local Republicans. 
     I used to be an Independent and I split my ticket.  But the local Republicans did everything they could to turn me into a Kiss My Big Blue Butt Democrat.  They finally did it.
     And they've done it again.
     The Republican Boys on Commissioners Court just added five new early voting sites. 
     All in very Republican areas, dammit.
     And they're trying to pass it off as increasing early voting totals.  Lyin' worthless petty little sons of motherless goats.  Yeah, adding new Republican early voting totals.
     Local folks will understand that adding new early voting locations at Pecan Grove, First Colony, Cinco Ranch, and Mission Bend doesn't come even close to looking fair.  None were added in Precinct 2, the only Democratic precinct in the county.  And Richmond still doesn't have an early voting location, even though the courthouse is here. 
     If they were asking for trouble, they got it.  I'm gonna be all over them like stink on .... stink on a .... stink on a county commissioner.

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September 26 - Okay, this is strictly local, but everyone might enjoy Boss Bob’s latest antics.
     Our county judge here in Fort Bend has an ego he’s got to push around in a wheelbarrow.  Guys like that tend to blow a lot of hot air, or puff up their resume in inverse proportion to their …. well, dangle.
     Boss Bob is that dangerous mixture of testosterone and Aqua Velva who does both.
     Last year Bob got caught trying to impersonate a judge.  He had to change his website and calm down his wild-eyed crazzzy claims that he’s a real judge before the Judicial Conduct Commission came to pay him an unpleasant visit. 
     I need to say here that a county judge is not a real judge.  Our last three county judges in Fort Bend have not even had college degrees.  We haven’t had a county judge with a college degree since the Republicans took over, which says something that you probably already know about Republicans.
     And then there’s Boss Bob Hebert, who claimed to have a PhD.  That would be Dr. Boss to you, son.
     Boss Bob said on his website that he had a PhD from California Coast University, obtained in 2004.  Now, I’m not saying that Boss Bob had anything to do with this, but California Coast University (Whose motto is: Yeah, well, we’ve never heard of you either.) stopped offering PhD’s in late 2004, just after Boss Bob got one. 
     Well, Boss Bob finally fessed-up that California Coast University (Go Fighting Seagulls!) is not like, you know, uh, a real university.  It’s not accredited by anyone except other dollar diploma office buildings who formed an accreditation group and gave one to each other.
     So, now enter the Internet Tubes.
     Boss Bob’s website – click the little one to get the big one – used to say this

 

     Now it says this ----

 

      Okay, I cannot explain to you how someone got a Master’s degree without ever getting a Batchelor’s degree, so I won’t even try.
     And, I cannot explain why Boss Bob’s former company, Eco Resources, where he still holds a fiduciary interest, can let almost $200,000 be embezzled and nobody gets indicted for it in over 2 years.  Maybe it’s magic.  (More on this later.)

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September 26 - Thank you Mike Luckovich ----

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September 26 - You know you're probably not going anywhere today if this is parked in front of your house ---

---- and this is at the end of your road ----

     Ahhhhhh, progress comes to the original Stephen F. Austin settlement.  We're getting a real street.

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September 25 - Okay, I'm from Texas, where we are  aficionados of bad taste.  I mean, we invented big hair, the leisure suit, and the Kilgore Rangerettes.  That pretty well insured us the title of Tacky Connoisseurs for a decade or two.
     Until ....
     Along come Rudy Giuliani.  If you thought answering your cell phone in the middle of a speech was in poor taste, you ain't seen nothing yet ---

A supporter of Rudy Giuliani's is throwing a party that aims to raise $9.11 per person for the Republican's presidential campaign.

Abraham Sofaer is having a fundraiser at his Palo Alto, Calif., home on Wednesday, when Giuliani backers across the country are participating in the campaign's national house party night.

But Sofaer said he had nothing to do with the "$9.11 for Rudy" theme.

"There are some young people who came up with it," Sofaer said when reached by telephone Monday evening. He referred other questions to Giuliani's campaign.

     We Texans hate to lose our title, but this puts tacky to shame.  Try as we might, we can't even come close to this. 

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September 25 - Sometimes you just gotta to step back from the horror of politics and eat something, dammit.
     And, as Average Betty says, "Well, you gotta start somewhere." 
     It's burrito time at Average Betty's.  TK's bringing the Margaritas and Betty's got the handcuffs and pole.  That's a party anywhere in America.      

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September 24 - Mike lets us know that our other favorite Republican, David Snyder of Roseland, is back in the pokey where he belongs. 

Roseland Town Council member David Snyder was ordered back to jail this morning for not following a magistrate’s order to obtain work and make regular child support payments.

     David's beginning to sound like a country-western song, ain't he?
     Republican men:  making weird seem normal.

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September 24 - Our friend Doyle from Nacogdoches has moved his rump to Oregon.  He reports it's a nice place to live. 
     I'm having a rash of friends moving to either Vermont or Oregon.  I don't know why, but I suspect that Rick Perry has something to do with it.
     Anyway, Doyle sent us this heads-up on a U.S. Attorney that they DIDN'T fire. 

DETROIT -- A U.S. Justice Department official has been arrested on suspicion of traveling to Detroit over the weekend to have sex with a minor.

John David R. Atchison, 53, an assistant U.S. attorney from the northern district of Florida, was arraigned in U.S. District Court in Detroit Monday afternoon.

An undercover officer posed as a mother offering her child to Atchison for sex, according to police.

     Atchinson, of course, is a registered Republican.

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September 24 - Oh, be still my heart.  Newt Gingrich thinks he should be President. 
     You remember Newt Gingrich, the guy who Bill Clinton beat up so badly that he had to look out his ear hole to see anything for a couple of a years.
     Newt says he can beat the Clinton machine.  Well, he's had some experience at tryin', but not at succeedin'. 

Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich will begin next week to seek financial commitments from donors for a presidential-nomination bid, the Georgia Republican told The Washington Times yesterday.

If he can get pledges for $30 million over the next three weeks, he will join the Republican presidential-nomination race — a prospect he had been downplaying until yesterday.

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September 24 -

 

      Happy Birthday Bubba!

 

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September 23 - UPDATED:  Patrick sends us the worst news we've had since George Bush was re-elected.
     It's added fuel for a burning nightmare I've been having for a long time.
     The twits at Townhall say a Giuliani / Perry ticket for '08 might be taking shape.
     For you folks from foreign states, if you like Bush, you'll love Perry.  Perry is Bush, but dumber.

UPDATE:  Even the Houston Chronicle is speculating about it this morning. 

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September 22  - Oh lookie here,  Texas's own Ted Poe is trying real hard to become Tom DeLay.  It seems that CREW has filed an ethics complain against Poe.

An ethics watchdog has filed a complaint with the Federal Election Commission accusing Rep. Ted Poe of Texas of several egregious violations of campaign laws and regulations, officials said Friday.

.....

FEC records show the Poe campaign failed to disclose information on 40 individuals who contributed to the campaign —— or $450,000 of the $1.7 million raised.

     When he was a judge, Ted was famous for making people stand on the street corner and wear signs of what crimes they committed, like "I was convicted of shoplifting." 
     Ted needs to get his cardboard and magic marker ready because I've got an idea ----

I'm Ted Poe and I Lack Ethics.

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September 21 - I've been telling you this for years.  Cowboy Bush is afraid of horses.  Everybody in Texas knew it all along.  He's a wuss.  Even little girls ride horses.
     Try to find a picture of him on a horse.  None exist.  Every man in Texas has his picture taken on a horse.  It's the law.  Look it up.
     But, Wuss Bush is a scardy cat.  Hell, the man can't even stay on a bicycle.  I've heard he's also scared of Segways and rocking chairs.

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September 21 - Oh Lord, me, too, Honey.
     Stephen Colbert interviewed Jeffrey Toobin last night.  Toobin related ...

...that "Justice Souter was so upset about the result in Bush v. Gore that not only did he almost resign the Court because he was so upset, but there were times when he thought about the case and he wept."

     Me, too, Honey.  One vote and we wouldn't be in this mess. 
     See the interview here.

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September 20 - UPDATE AT BOTTOM:  Patrick sent us this heads-up that Tom DeLay's clock is ticking down.  They've subpoenaed information on his spiritual/political advisor. 

A federal grand jury has subpoenaed payroll records from the House for Ed Buckham, former chief of staff to ex-House Majority Leader Tom DeLay (R-Texas).

The subpoena, issued by a grand jury in Washington, D.C., is the first formal notification that Buckham is the focus of a federal corruption probe by the Justice Department. The subpoena was sent to Daniel Beard, chief administrative officer for the House, and formally read into the Congressional Record this afternoon, although Buckham was not mentioned in the official notification.

     Buckham, who is DeLay's closest friend, is an ordained minister who probably shouldn't be left alone with the love offering plate.

Buckham also has ties to other lawmakers under federal investigation, including Rep. John Doolittle (R-Calif.). Buckham's lobbying firm hired Doolittle's wife, Julie Doolittle, to do consulting work. Doolittle's house was recently raided by FBI agents as part of the continuing Abramoff investigation.

     Local lore around here has always been that Buckham will claim minister privilege for withholding information about DeLay.  However, with jail in the picture, Buckham may well sing like a fat lady in a choir robe.

UPDATE:  And, Patrick also reminds us that you better be careful what you ask for because you just might ... have to eat your words in a jail cell.
     This is Tom DeLay speaking on March 8th -

“They’re not going after me,” DeLay said of the FBI. “They’re going after other people and they’re questioning the other people about whether they know anything I may have done. And we’ve given them all the records and that’s the problem they’re having.”

DeLay said the evidence shows that his wife did not accept improper payments: “She did her work and she was underpaid for the work she did and they can’t make the case. It’s a Justice Department that is running amok. Fish or cut bait. Do something.”

     Yep - he kinda asked for it.  Well, heck, let's be honest, he begged for it like a little girl.
     A reminder from Ben Sargent ---

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September 20 - They'll send them yellow ribbons instead.

Senate Republicans yesterday rejected a bipartisan proposal to lengthen the home leaves of U.S. troops fighting in Iraq and Afghanistan, derailing a measure that war opponents viewed as one of the best chances to force President Bush to accelerate a redeployment of forces.

     You know, I wouldn't have a problem with this as long as congressional Republicans pledge not to take a single day of vacation - not even Saturdays or Sundays - until the troops come home.
     And if this picture doesn't scare the poop outta you, nothing will.  The bottom picture was taken during Bush's last trip to Iraq.

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September 20 - It's just six weeks until we have to vote on amendments to the Texas Constitution. 
     Here's a short explanation on an "About" website of what they are and what they mean.  And here's a 130 page explanation (easily skimmed) in PDF format put out by the Texas Legislative Council.  It has the history of the amendments for each one both the pros and cons.

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September 20 - This cowboy walks into a bar and orders a beer. His hat is made of brown wrapping paper. And so are his shirt, vest, chaps, pants, and boots. His spurs are also made of paper. Pretty soon, the sheriff arrives and arrests him for rustling.

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September 19 - Thanks to James for the heads-up, or heads-down as in this case.

"I respect [Malaysian] Prime Minister Badawi, admire his leadership," Bush said. "When his wife died, I tried to call him early just to let him know I cared about him."

"He has remarried," one of the journalists told him.

"Has he?" Bush asked. "Good. I'll congratulate him. Thanks for giving me that heads-up. Don't put that in the article that you had to tell me that. You can put it in there if you want. I'll be glad to -- I'm going to congratulate him. That's neat."

"You did, sir," interjected National Security Council aide Dennis Wilder.

"What?"

"You did congratulate him."

"Exactly. I'm going to congratulate him again," Bush said, trying to recover as the journalists laughed. "I'll double the congratulations. That's right, I did write him a note. I forgot. Did I call him or write him a note?"

"You wrote him a note," Wilder said.

"That's right, yes. Sent him a couple flowers."

     Oh Sweet Jesus, Bush is missing four years out of his life.  Sadly, it's the last six years.   Badawi wife died in 2003.  He re-married in June of this year - that's like, I dunno, three months ago.  Sent him a "couple of flowers," did ya?  How thoughtful of you.
     I mean, it's fine with Aunt Verdelia can't remember where she put the shampoo, but this man is President of the whole entire United States of America. 
     Here's a picture of Bush with Badawi in September of last year.  Probably sent him flowers then, too.

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September 19 - Email from John --

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September 19 - Who says justice is blind?
     A Fort Bend County woman got 30 days in the county jail to be served on weekends for stealing from the PTA - twice.  No kidding, twice.  She was convicted in 2004 and got probation.  She did it again two years later.  Thirty days.  County jail.  On weekends.
     On the other hand, an Austin woman got six years hard time for stealing from a political consultant who is known as "Dr. Dirt."  Personally, I think she should have been given a medal for it.
     Six years for a first conviction in Austin.  Thirty days in Fort Bend.  You do the math and tell me where would you steal.

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September 18 - Email from Steve ---

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September 18 - Crazy and mean is still considered an asset in Republican politics.

Texas Gov. Rick Perry outperformed Arnold Schwarzenegger at the recent California Republican convention. At least that's the view of some conservative bloggers in the Golden State who compared speeches delivered by the two governors.

Schwarzenegger seemed to lose the crowd with talks about embracing universal healthcare and joining the fight against global warming, according to blog postings.

Perry got a better reaction with some of his thoughts:

"I don't know about you, but I've heard Al Gore talk about man-made global warming so much that I'm starting to think that his mouth is the leading source of all that supposedly deadly carbon dioxide."

     So, take Perry's crazy and mean talk and mark it down as  proof that George Bush and Tom DeLay had a love child.

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September 18 - 'Nuff said.

     Thank you, Ann Telnaes.

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September 17 - A lot you know my friend Fenway Fran, who moved to Oregon dammit.  Since she left, Bitchin' Betty and the Sequined Backhoes have been without a fiddle player. 
     Fran has a blog.
     She wrote a break-your-heart poem to her Uncle Dick yesterday.  Her blog will be baseball, politics, poetry, wine, and all things pink and girly.  My kind of blog.
     Enjoy.  And please feel free to pester her.

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September 17 - For a couple of years, we’ve been following the governmental antic of David and Dorothy Snyder in Roseland, Indiana, the only place where the Republicans are crazier than here.  Thanks to our friend Deb, who lives dangerously close to it all, we’ve kept up with the brawls on city council.
     This time, David Snyder gets out of jail for assaulting a police office just in time to attend a GOP function.  And this time, you even get a picture of David showing why you shouldn’t screw with Officer Jack Tiller.  But, even a bigger treat is that there’s video!
     Roseland and the Snyders have become so downright enjoyable that someone at Notre Dame made a movie about them. 
     So, if you have time to kill and want to catch up on the adventures in Roseland, here’s a Google search that will get you started.

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September 17 - A young Texan walks into a bar and orders a drink. "Got any ID?" asks the bartender. The Texan replies, "About what?"

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September 17 - This is just a rumor, but I heard that both Juanita and Mark at View from 22 will return for the election season in a couple of weeks.
     Just a rumor I heard, and what would I know about such things?  I'll let you know if I hear any more about it.

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September 16 - Okay, this may be one of the funniest things I've ever seen.
     It takes a little 'splainin'.
     First, we have a chart used by General Petraeus in his testimony before Congress.  You can see the full-sized one here.  Check out all the question marks, dreams and hopes just to get us back to where we started 9 months ago.

     Now some seriously funny guy had a boatload of fun with General Petraeus' chart.  You can see the full-sized one here and it's worth a close inspection.

     I think he nailed Petraeus' whole presentation with minor changes to one chart.  (I think my favorite part is the pony pony pony pony across the bottom.)

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September 16 - In the "No Shoot, Sherlock" category, Alan Greenspan shows why he's so darned smart ----

He [Greenspan] further says the GOP deserved the stomping it took in November's congressional elections -- a ballot that saw both houses of Congress wrested from Republican control -- because the party "swapped principle for power."

In the book, Greenspan wrote that Bush essentially left an unbridled GOP Congress to spend money however it saw fit, and by not vetoing a single bill in six years, the president deprived the nation of checks and balances.     

     Ya think?
     I wonder if Greenspan's book has a chapter entitled:  "Warm Beer, Bad; Cold Beer, Good."  
     Thank you, Capitan Obvious. 

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September 16 - For those who are wondering how much money Tom DeLay was paid to write his book, the answer is ... probably too much.
     Alfredo sends us this information from Congressional Quarterly Politics from a story entitled, "How Low Can the Price of a House Leader’s Memoir Go?"

And what about Republican leaders who might have wanted to be Speaker? Things are a little slow for their books at the moment.

For example, this year’s “No Retreat, No Surrender: One American’s Fight,” by former Majority Leader Tom DeLay of Texas (1985-2006), starts at 89 cents.

Another Texan is further down the price list: “Armey’s Axiom: 40 Hard-Earned Truths from Politics, Faith, and Life,” by ex-Majority Leader Dick Armey (1985-2003), is also available for a penny.

     When it goes to a penny, I'll buy it.  I won't read it, but I'll buy it.  Heck, Tom didn't read it, so why should I?  

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September 16 - TK and I have fallen in love ... with Average Betty.  No politics, just food and fun!
     TK likes the coffee cake.  I like the Faquitos.  Move over, Paula Deen and Rachel Ray .....

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September 16 - E. Claire sends us this ---

     Oops, he did it again.

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September 14 - We support the military, but who is the military supporting?  Well, Democrats it appears.

As the Iraq war drags on and US casualties mount, members of the military appear to be showing their discontent by donating more to Democrats, a campaign finance watchdog group said today.

Service members have traditionally supported the Republican Party, but there has been a dramatic shift since the war started in 2003 away from financial backing for GOP candidates for president and Congress, the nonpartisan Center for Responsive Politics said.

[blah, blah, blah]

Ron Paul, the only Republican candidate who opposes the war, has brought in at least $19,250 -- more than Vietnam War hero John McCain, who supports the war and has raised $18,600 from military personnel.

     Yeah, yeah, I saw Bush's speech last night.  He's delusional and they know it.  Lord, that man scares me more every day.

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September 14 - Oh, pluuuueze let Fred Thompson be the GOPper nominee for President.

Republican presidential candidate Fred Thompson gave no opinion Thursday when asked about efforts by President Bush and Congress to keep Terri Schiavo alive, saying he does not remember details of the right-to-die case that stirred national debate.

Thompson was asked in an interview for Bay News 9's "Political Connections" program whether he thought Congress' intervention to save the life of the brain-damaged woman two years ago was appropriate.

"I can't pass judgment on it. I know that good people were doing what they thought was best," Thompson said. "That's going back in history. I don't remember the details of it."

     Doesn't remember?  Doesn't remember?  I'm sorry, but I had to say that twice just to believe it myself.
     Then next thing out of the bag, he wants to do away with No Child Left Behind because education is a state issue.  He believes in giving education decisions to the states.
     Good grief!  The idiot voted for No Child Left Behind.  I guess he forgot that, too.
     So, it's true.  He IS trying to be Regan.

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September 14 - Every Friday should start with a laugh and TS sent us a great one ---

After clogging my arteries by proxy with that item about the fried banana pudding stuffed burrito, I thought you probably deserved this.

     Combining social commentary, humor, and recipes makes this a one-stop internet machine delight!

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September 12 - Okay, Nick Lampson gets one Get Susan Off My Back Free card.
     This came to my house yesterday.  Click the little one to get the big one.

     Apparently Nick is anti lung cancer.  Apparently Phillip Morris is not. 
     Please call the number and tell them that you're proud of Nick Lampson. 

UPDATE:  I am told that there's another one with the same message about Kay Bailey Hutchison.

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September 12 - Well, damn.  What a heartbreaker. 

NEW YORK The Op-Ed by seven active duty U.S. soldiers in Iraq questioning the war drew international attention just three weeks ago. Now two of the seven are dead.

Sgt. Omar Mora and Sgt. Yance T. Gray died Monday in a vehicle accident in western Baghdad, two of seven U.S. troops killed in the incident which was reported just as Gen. David Petraeus was about to report to Congress on progress in the "surge." The names have just been released.
 

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September 12 - LOCAL INTEREST:  Speak now or forever hold your peace.  We're buying developers a new road unless you pitch a fit.

And here's another story on the toll road.  Tomorrow is the deadline for voicing your objections.

And here is an excellent blog about transportation and an entry about the Grand Parkway toll road.

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September 12 - Goodness Sake, the last thing this man needed was more coffee.

SYRACUSE, N.Y. (AP) - A man who tried to run over a Burger King worker while ordering breakfast had to settle for jail food instead.

Dana Salce, 20, got into a dispute with workers at a Burger King just after 8 a.m. Sunday when he refused to turn his music down while ordering at the drive-through, Syracuse Police Lt. Joseph Cecile said.

Cecile said Salce grabbed the eatery's female manager, tried to pull her through a window and then attempted to run over a worker who came to the manager's aid.

He was jailed on charges of attempted assault, harassment, and criminal possession of a weapon and was due in court Monday.

     And he had a weapon? 
     Look, I've had bad jobs and I've had bad mornings, but I never assaulted the poor worker at Burger King.  If you're gonna assault, go straight for the King himself.

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September 12 - There's an old Texas political story (which means: probably not true) that goes like this:
     Ole boy was running for sheriff out in West Texas.  He was asked a question about a controversial subject.  His reply?  "Some of my friends are for it.  Some of my friends are against it.  I'm for my friends."
     Up until yesterday, that would have gotten laughter at a Democratic function.  But it's come a little too close to home now.
     Congressman Nick Lampson was asked about his position on the Iraq war.

In an arena where the legislative battle lines have been drawn mostly along partisan boundaries — Democrats pressing for troop withdrawal deadlines and benchmarks, Republicans against them — only one of the Texans appeared to fit in neither camp.

Rep. Nick Lampson, a Stafford Democrat, is working with both parties to find common ground.

"There are those who advocate an immediate withdrawal from Iraq. And there are those who want to send in more troops and continue with an open-ended commitment," Lampson said in a prepared statement. "Somewhere in the middle exists a practical and realistic solution that honors the commitment and sacrifice of our troops. That is type of solution I will support and work towards."

Lampson, one of the GOP's top targets for defeat in 2008, declined to discuss his efforts further. Thus far, he has not broken from the Democratic leadership on Iraq votes.

     Now Nick doesn't know what that solution is or even have any suggestions, which is akin to being a leader without knowing where to go. 
     With this and the FISA vote, I guess we can withdraw Nick's name from the Profiles in Courage nomination.

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September 12 - God help the poor conservative white male, he is so put-upon. 
     I can't help myself.  I am totally obsessed with the writers at GOPUSA. 
     Today's feature is a conservative white male named Chuck Muth who knows for a fact that there's a concerted effort to erase conservative white males from history.
     Chuck homeschooled his kids so he could keep them from knowing that not only conservative white men are good citizens. 
     Poor Chuck bought highly rated books to teach his kids and the real truth - dammit - the books mentions Rosa Parks, Helen Keller, Colin Powell, John Kennedy, Jane Adams and Daniel Inouye as good citizens.
     Chuck thinks the book should have listed Gen. Douglas MacArthur as a war hero instead of Colin Powell.  Yep, the same MacArthur who got fired for insubordination.
     And as soon as Chuck can think up a blind deaf conservative white male who became an international inspiration, Helen Keller is gonna get the boot, too.
     Chuck ends his day trip to Nutsville by saying ---

Fortunately, as a home school parent I’m able to nip this crud in the bud by skipping over these examples in the ol’ textbook and offer up my own. But if such liberal PC claptrap is in our home-school curriculum, can you imagine how they’re re-writing history in the government’s re-education camps? Be afraid.

      Thank you, Chuck, for reminding me that that I have much to fear. 

---

September 12 - Holy Backstroke, there's a storm a'coming, Ethel.
     When the red places on the weather map are going in big ole circles, you know that's not good.

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September 12 - Poor Texas Senator John Cornyn.  Even his fellow Republicans in the Senate are trying to ignore him.
     Yesterday Cornyn tried to pass an amendment to a transportation bill denouncing Move On for making a bad and juvenile pun out of General David Petraeus' name.  You'd think that would be easier to pass than sliding off a greased pig backwards.
     Not so much for Cornyn.  All he got was eye rolls.

Mr. Cornyn's proposed amendment to the transportation and housing spending bill condemned attacks on Gen. Petraeus.

Democratic Sen. Richard Durbin of Illinois distanced himself from the ad, but said the resolution was unnecessary. He defended the group's right to speak against the war.

He accused Mr. Cornyn of holding up the transportation bill with the amendment and, in the end, the amendment was ruled not germane to the spending bill.

     I certain that somebody has to explain to Cornyn what germane means. 
     Ah, the smell of it's-election-season-and-I'm-low-in-the-polls .....

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September 11 - Our amusing friend, Bobby Eberle of Jeff Gannon fame and runner-up for Vice Chair of the Texas GOP, has really got my goat today.
     Eberle, who continues to write a column entitled "The Loft" in spite of the fact that he's Jeff Gannon's former beard  employer, has his 9-11 column today which says, among other dopey things ...

"Memorial services in honor of those lost on that terrible day are being tainted by accusations that some are "playing politics" with the event. In addition, those are the left are bent on losing the war on terror by undermining the actions of the administration at every turn."

     Whoa, Big Bobby, pull in on them reins.
     Most of us, at least those of us who get our news somewhere other than Rush Limbaughs drug flashbacks, know that the War on Terror has diddle squat to do with 9-11. 
     As far as "accusations" that some a playing politics with 9-11, look in the danged mirror, Honey. 

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September 10 - As most of you recall, back in February of this year, I filed a complaint with the Texas Ethics Commission on County Judge Bob Hebert for paying his wife about $500 an hour from his campaign account for bookkeeping.  Bob plead guilty, paid his fine, reimbursed his campaign account and moved on.  Everybody has forgotten about it by now.
     Not so with Commissioner Andy Meyers.  I filed a complaint about him at the same time, but for far more reasons.  Click the little one to get the big one.

     Well, Andy is waiting for me to die or the law to change.  I got a notice today that it's still pending.  Do that click thing again on the letter below.

     Come on, Andy.  You're hogging all the stupid again.
     Hey, Skippy, you know you violated the law many times over or you wouldn't have filed all new reports covering the past 2 years.  You know you ignored the rules and proceeded to pay yourself and your son every durn dime you could finagle.  So, fess up.
     You're dumber than bean dip to stall this sucker closer to election when people will remember that you are only the second person in the history of the county to have ethics violations. 

     By the way, I also filed a complaint against PBS&J for swearing an oath that they gave money to our commissioners that our commissioners claim they never got.  It's still pending, too. 
     And yes, it's the same PBS&J who's getting the big contract for the new toll road.  Good grief.
     Don't say I didn't warn you when we all get backed against the wall with that sucker.  If you run a search for PBS&J and investigation, you get 22,500 hits.

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September 10 - This is of local interest only. 
     They're doing it again.
     Those of you who are following the toll road mess, please allow me to take you on visit to where it all started.  I wrote this column for the newspaper in March of 1999.  It took me a while to find it, but I did.
     Only the names have changed.  In 1999, the county judge and the commissioners got a free trip to Hong Kong out of the deal. 

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September 10 - Well, lookie here.  The Houston Chronicle finally noticed Fort Bend and our odd Commissioner's Court. 
     Explaining why Commissioner's Court meetings last such a short time ---

The commissioners' staff have already pre-approved the items and reached agreements among themselves on behalf of the commissioners. So when the commissioners meet the following Tuesday, they just needed to rubber-stamp those items, not having to talk about them. It's a way of bypassing public scrutiny.

     Well, yeah.  It's a end-run around the Texas Open Meetings Laws.  But you don't expect our very important Commissioners to sit in a real meeting on Tuesdays, now do you?
     (Andy couldn't come anyway; he's too busy filing expense reports.)

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September 10 - Our friend James who comments here sometime when we're lucky, got published in the Dallas Morning News. 
     It's some dandy writing and even better story telling.  Treat yourself and read it.

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September 9 - And he was going to visit his mother ....

A naked man driving along the Indiana Toll Road was arrested and charged because his lewd conduct distracted other motorists, police said.

The 37-year-old Chicago man was traveling east to Ohio to visit his mother, police said. He was nude and had petroleum jelly on his hands when a state trooper pulled him over about 10 miles from the Ohio line Wednesday, police said.

The man, who told police he was comfortable driving in the nude, was charged with misdemeanor indecent exposure, punishable by up to a year in jail.

     Hey, at least he wasn't talking on his cell phone.  I'd trade a nakkid driver for a yakkin' driver any day of the week. 

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September 9 - I've already ordered it.  I'll let you know if I liked Steve Bickerstaff's new book any better than this reviewer at the Caller-Times. 

.... he does build a powerful case that DeLay's leadership of the plot to unseat 10 Anglo Democrats and give Republicans a majority in the state's congressional delegation was an immense abuse of power.

     What do you want to bet that it sells more than DeLay's book did?
     It's called: "Lines in the Sand: Congressional Redistricting in Texas and the Downfall of Tom DeLay."  Yep, I like that title.

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September 7 - Well, even the Houston Chronicle agrees.  Mikal Watts owes us an explanation or he needs to drop out.  It's refreshing to see the Chronicle take a principled stand.

As a well- and largely self-financed candidate for high office, Watts owes voters an explanation: Does he think his campaign donations influence the outcome of cases? Regardless of the answer, Watts should explain to the voters why his outrageous claim does not violate the public trust and disqualify him from the office he seeks.

      Good thing we discovered Watt's true thoughts on justice before the primary.  There's probably eight or eleven more on the list of "incredibly stoopid things that Mikal Watts said" that John Cornyn is sitting on.
     Watts is folding like a three dollar suitcase at the train station. 

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September 7 - I have a buddy who reads my site every day.  Yesterday, my buddy got an email from Judge Linda Yanez asking for a campaign donation. 
     Having read my site, my buddy - who is a senior citizen - emailed Judge Yanez's campaign.
     I have no idea who Miguel Carrera is, but if he has ever referred to himself as a "political professional," Ms. Yanez needs to ask for her money back.  There's nothing professional about Miguel Carrera.

     You know the drill - click the little one to get the big one. 
     Miguel, in case you're into Googling yourself and you find this, please make a little note that says, "Do not hack-off people unnecessarily.  You may need their vote in November."
     More importantly, don't make fun of somebody's spelling when your own grammar stinks to high heck.  Check that second sentence, son, and wipe that smart aleck grin off your face. 
     Most importantly, take the time to explain your candidate's position.  Is she going to return the money?  Is she insulted and outraged that Mr. Watts abused her good name in this manner?  Is she going to do something about it?  Or, is she just going to continue to take Mr. Watt's abuse and his money?
     Miguel, Miguel, Miguel.  Are you the type of staff Ms. Yanez plans to have once she's on the court? 
 

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September 7 - Heads up and good reading for those who haven't seen Tom DeLay suffer enough yet!

     Here's the substantial cooperation agreement for Neil Volz.  Simply put, Volz and Tony Rudy have been singing a duet on Tommy. 
     It's refreshing to know that Republican men don't have to be in bathroom stalls to screw each other.

 

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September 6 - My friend named Sybil is  funny.  She just told me this one liner ----

If you think a night on the town involves a public toilet, you might just be a Republican.

 

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September 6 - The good news?  Our pollen crop is the largest in our lifetime.  The bad news?  Nobody wants to buy it from us. 

Allergy sufferers, look out: This year's ragweed season is going to be a monster.

All that ragweed pollen could make this one of the worst seasons for allergy sufferers in five decades. Thanks to a rainy spring and summer, ragweed plants are about to explode throughout North Texas. On Friday, the pollen count is expected to climb to 11.3 on a scale that tops out at 12, according to the Web site pollen.com.

     Bubba and I went to the Ozarks last year for a vacation where the air is crisp and clean.  It made Bubba real nervous.  "I don't trust air I can't see," he explained. 
     Okay, I think I'm ready.  Hurricane season, check.  Pollen season, check.  Hunting season with Dick Cheney coming soon, check. Lord, if the Lege was in session, we'd have to sever ourselves from the rest of the country just out of kindness. 

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September 6 - Thanks to Chip Bok, here's a great thought for the day ---

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September 5 - UPDATED at bottom: I knew there was something about Mikal Watts that made the little hairs on the back of my neck stand up.

Democratic U.S. Senate candidate Mikal Watts of San Antonio once tried to pressure a legal opponent into a $60 million personal injury lawsuit settlement by claiming he would have an advantage on appeal because of his firm's "heavy" campaign financial support to an appellate court's justices, "all of whom are good Democrats."

     Creepy.  On the one hand, he talks about what a sincere Christian he is over at the Baptist Church and that's why he opposes abortion rights and stem cell research, and then he turns around and says he can buy democracy.  Poor dude is in the wrong party.
     To add a little more bite to the chili, Watt's letter also mentions another Democrat - Linda Yanez.

The letter goes on to name Justices Errlinda Castillo, Nelda Rodriguez, J. Bonner Dorsey, Federico Hinojosa and Linda Yanez, and says his firm also has financially supported them. Hinojosa, Castillo and Dorsey are no longer on the court.

... The firm donated $50,000 to Yanez in 2002.

     Yanez jumped into the race for Texas Supreme Court Place 8 after Judge Susan Criss of Galveston had already announced. 
     When Yanez announced against Criss (with plenty of races uncontested on the Supreme Court), folks began to wonder if Watts was trying to buy his own Democratic ticket in the primary.  Why would Yanez run for a seat that already had a Democrat running? 
     The last damn thing Democrats need are a crew of good-ole-boys filling each other's pockets.  Republicans are doing just fine filling that niche.

     I’m fixin’ to hack-off a bunch of big-money Democrats.  Again. 
     I want to be proud to be a Texas Democrat.  I do not want my rallying cry to be, “Well, the Republicans do it, too.”
     The more I think about this, the madder I get. 
     We’re Democrats, dammit.  We’re supposed to be against sell-out politicians and even the appearance of impropriety in the judicial system.  Dammit.
     Judge Linda Yanez needs to return Mikal Watt’s $50,000 contribution with a terse little note suggesting that if Mr. Watts ever again hints that she is for sale or can be bought, he’s liable to wake up to find the imprint of a gavel upside his head. 
     Yanez simply saying that Watts never received any preferential treatment from the appeals court isn’t enough.  There needs to be a stronger sanction against a Democrat who says he’s bought influence and has the cancelled checks to back it up. 
     Until she returns the money, she’s as guilty as he is of making us all look bad.

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September 5 - We get email from Sam this morning.

September 4 - Okay, head on over to the Texas Democrats website and vote for your Presidential favorite.  One vote per person, please. 
     John Edwards is winning big as of today and that's fine with me.
     Since the Texas GOP wouldn't let us have an early primary, this will have to do.

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September 4 - This could only happen in Texas.  I mean that.  Okay, maybe South Carolina but that’s it.
     Granny Geek reminded us that the Texas State Fair is a tribute to glorious gluttony.  But, this wins hands down.
     The winner this year was Fried Cookie Dough. It looked good enough to eat, and I admire someone who can come up with that recipe.
     However, this kinda stands out in the annals of Texas cookery:

Although food vendor Debbie Hays and her family were among the vendors who weren't awarded a Big Tex trophy, they said they are still walking tall.

B.W.'s Original Fried Banana Pudding was the invention of Ms. Hays' brother, longtime concessionaire B.W. Morrow, who died of a heart attack earlier this year. His recipe was picked to be in the contest posthumously.

His wife and daughter came to the contest to see how everyone would respond to Mr. Morrow's last fair food contribution, banana pudding wrapped in a tortilla and fried.

     Good grief, it killed him. Don’t eat it. 
     I mean, those were some brave judges.  “Here, eat this. Last guy who ate it?  Died of a heart attack.”   Only in Texas would that be considered culinary praise.
     When I die I want my obituary to say that I was very old, very sick, or doing something worth dieing for.  I do not want it to say that I died of banana pudding. 
     Did I tell you that my friend Verdelia said she had to quit turning on Paula Deen’s show because she gained 5 pounds every time she watched it?  That’s true.
     Anyway, I figure I’ll stay away from the banana pudding but have a heap of that Fried Cookie Dough. 

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September 4 - Texas political heroes from the past - Babe Swartz and Dolph Briscoe are pushing the panic button, but they are having one installed.

In the current world of terrorist threats, the Legislature this year expanded police surveillance powers and declined to put tighter controls on an intelligence computer database being built at the insistence of Gov. Rick Perry's office.

Two-thirds of the House voted to remove management of the computer from Perry's staff and give it entirely to DPS, but the measure was not part of the final border security law, Senate Bill 11, signed by the governor. Civil libertarians remain concerned that the database will be misused in the future, particularly if managed by a political office such as a governor's.

     Honey, I'm not saying that Rick Perry doesn't need intelligence.  But he needs the kind you get from reading books and doing arithmetic.
     The story discusses how Gov. Dolph stomped out a previous DPS "intelligence gathering" apparatus that was meant for purely political purposes.
     Predicatively, the Republicans are trying to do it again. 

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September 3 - Our friend Alfredo notices that considering the sweet deals given to Ney's staff, Tony Rudy must be singing an octave higher than anyone supposed.
     That means Tom DeLay will say something crazier than usual very soon.

Prosecutors are continuing to talk to Abramoff and Michael Scanlon, his close associate and a former top aide to former House Majority Leader Tom DeLay (R-Texas). In late August, the government postponed scheduled status hearings with Judge Ellen Huvelle for both men, giving them three more months to continue to spill information.

In late July, prosecutors also agreed to give Tony Rudy more time to cooperate, scheduling another status hearing for him Nov. 5.

     Oh, this might be fun!

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September 3 -  (Skip over this whole thing unless you're a political junkie.  I'm throwing a conniption hissy fit this morning.  Scroll on down to the cartoon.)

     THIS is what's wrong with politics.  Consultants.  Political professionals. 

In just a few election cycles, running for president of the United States has undergone a profound - and costly - change. Campaigns that once began as ideological missions driven by candidates and volunteers have been subsumed by a permanent class of professionals whose job is to keep the campaign on a carefully crafted script.

The 2008 race has already set new benchmarks for the use of political consultants, with two candidates - Republicans Mitt Romney and John McCain - having already spent more on consultants in six months than what the eventual 2004 nominees, John F. Kerry and George W. Bush, spent on professional advisers for their entire campaigns.

     Don't even get me started.
     Okay, get me started.
     I've been wanting to say this for a long time and Labor Day seems like a good time.  Don't bother reading this diatribe unless you're a political junkie, and even then you might be bored.

     Here’s how I see how high-dollar professional political “consultants” came to ruin Democratic politics, not only nationwide, but even in state,  congressional and local races. 
     Politics used to be different.  Politicians had to go to church, little league ballgames, county fairs, the Rotary Club, high school football games, and just about all the neighborhood gatherings.  They had to get themselves liked and respected to get elected.
     It continued after they got elected.  They had to shake hands, visit with people in their district, attend boring high school plays, go to backyard barbeques, mingle, see and be seen.  
     That was certainly time-consuming and fairly boring.  Politicians began to grow weary of having to listen to people, smile, and act concerned.  It was hard work.
     At that same exact time, along came a group of people who couldn’t get jobs.  They had degrees in political science, but there weren’t enough politics labs to employ them all.  Try looking in the want-ads for “needed: political scientist.”   Generally, they weren’t smart enough for law school, and they had no marketable skills for the real world.
     Eureka!
     One of these unemployables went to a politician and said, “Hey, I have a deal for you.  You don’t have to waste your valuable time mingling with the people of your district.  You have much better things to do.  You can quit going to all these events.  Come election time, I’ll send mail outs and press releases saying you care about people and that your opponent is a son of a motherless goat.  You’ll have more free time to think about important things because you’re an important man, but you’ll still get elected.”
     The politician bought this hook, line, and ego inflater.
     The political science major gets a job and an elected official got re-elected without having to fret about …. well, people in their district.
     So now their opponents had to have consultants, too.
     That jumped the market, and the price of really good consultants who could lie well and paint a false picture of their client became about the same as landing on Boardwalk with a hotel. 
     Darwin’s theory kicked in and the slyest consultants survived the best.  Being sly by nature, they worked a deal with printers, media people, and other consultants that they got a kickback off referring business to them.  So, the consultants now drew a salary, demanded “staff” so they could hire their friends, and then got a kickback on media advertising. 
     It doesn’t take a math major to figure out that the more money the politician spent, the more money the consultant made.  So consultants decided that political battles should not be done face to face, but with tv ads, mail outs, and opposition research. 
     Asking a political consultant if you need to run more tv ads is like asking a barber if you need a haircut. 
     As each side raised the stakes, the grassroots became unnecessary.  Consultants became a cottage industry, and then they grew like fungus to monopolize the market.  It was a great job - consultants could spend all their time behind closed doors, not even in the district, and spend money like wildfire.  Not a dime for grassroots building or even buying food for volunteers, but hundreds of thousands of dollars to media consultants, especially those who give a kickback.
     Meanwhile, with all the money flying around, the grassroots, the people in the district who care about politics, became a quaint relic, vaguely bothersome, and very patronized. 
     The whole plan collapsed on itself.  Within a decade, politicians were now spending all their time on the phone raising money to pay the consultants and their expensive bullcorn. 
     Politicians whine, whine, whine that they never get to do anything but be on the phone begging for money all day every day.  Yo Dude, you could have just gone to a little league baseball game or two instead.  I do not feel sorry for you.
     And then consultants began to tell us that we need to nominate rich people instead of qualified people because rich people don’t have to use their time begging for money.  Good grief, are you nuts?
     Look, we cannot win with money, but we must  – and CAN – win with ideas. 
     We have to re-build the grassroots.  We have to have the guts to fire the consultants and ask the people in every city, county, and state how to win. 
     That's my opinion.  I could be wrong.  But at least I'm not being paid to have it.

     I'm outta here for a picnic with other grassroots Democrats!

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September 3 - Have a great Labor Day!

     Click the little one to get the big one.  Thanks to Jim Morin.

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September 2 - Well, I guess he figured the Republican Party was kinky enough all on its own.

Kinky Friedman's next dance will be with the Democrats.

Friedman, an entertainer and novelist who tried last year to become the first Texas independent to win the governorship since Sam Houston, says he's not through with electoral politics but has come to the conclusion that he'll need backing of a major party if he'll have any shot of winning.

So he's laying the groundwork for entering the 2010 Democratic gubernatorial primary.

"I consider myself a Democrat in the mold of JFK, [former Texas Gov.] Ann Richards and [journalist] Molly Ivins,"

     The only time I've ever seen Kinky at a loss for words was at the Art Car Parade in Houston two years ago.  Kinky was riding in the parade, but his art car stalled and had to be pulled over. 
     Everybody was running over to get their picture taken with him, except for my baby boy, who approached him with with a Democratic tee-shirt and said, "Can you please tell me why the Party of John Kennedy is not good enough for you?" 
     Kinky chewed on his cigar for a minute and replied, "No, I can't."  He then turned to adoring fans and left that thought behind. 
     I think it's amusing that Kinky mentions JFK in his decision to become an Democrat.  Baby Boy will be proud.

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September 1 - We get email from Patrick about the GOP straw poll -----

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September 1 - Take 2 minutes out of your long weekend to enjoy Keith Olbermann name Tom DeLay "The Worst Person in the World." 

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September 1 - Let's start off the month with a story from my brother ----

Three friends from Thibodeaux, Louisiana were asked, "When you're in your casket, and your friends and church members are mourning over you, what would you like dem to say?"

Trosclair said: "I would like dem to say I was wonderful husband, a fine spiritual leader, and a great family man."

Leblanc commented: "I would like dem to say I was a wonderful teacher and servant of da church who made a huge difference in people's lives."

Boudreaux said: "I'd like dem to say, 'Look, he's movin!'

 

My name is Susan DuQuesnay Bankston. I live in Richmond, Texas, in the heart of Tom DeLay's old district.  It's crazy here.  No, seriously, it's triple z crazzzy.

I used to be an independent voter, but that all changed when I got to know a few local Republicans.  They are meaner than 10 acres of snakes and have the ethical compass of a bank robber. 

So, I decided that they could just Kiss My Big Blue Butt.

A lot of what I post here has to do with local politics, but you probably have the same folks in your local government.

This ain't a blog.  Blogs are way too trendy for me.  I've been doing this since 1992, so I'm used to it even if you ain't. 

Email me and I'll find a place to put it if I like it.